Messages By: bjork12

I just went to an Eating Disorders support group... I had gone to it a few months ago and then kinda forgotten about it, so today I went back.  My therapist, my dietitian, and another dietitian take turns running it, and today it was the other dietitian's turn.  We had a big group this time, about 10 people, including myself.  We all spoke in turn, and there was only one emaciated woman there, which I was glad about (not that I was glad that there were *any* emaciated people there, but at least there was only 1 and not 5).  The rest of the people were pretty "normal", though I couldn't keep myself from comparing and blah blah blah...

They gave me some pretty good advice when I spoke.  The thinng is, my parents think I'm doing "great" because my weight hasn't gone down significantly, and that's really not the truth.  Things are going on that they don't know about.  The advice they gave me is that my mom and/or both my parents and I should have a little "family meeting" with my therapist and discuss the things that are going wrong.  I'm just afraid this is going to explode.

Bjork

 I've had Anorexia for 13 years.  My lowest weight occured about 2 years ago, and that was 64 lbs, and I'm 5'4".   I passed out at the intake interview of the last treatment center that I went to because I was so bad off.  I'm never going to a treatment center ever again.  That treatment center, while they were caring and I made friends there, made me gain too much weight.  Now I'm stuck at 130 lbs and I can't do anything to lose anything.  I've been on this friggin plateau for several months, just ask my dietitian. She's happy about it, I'm not.  I'm such a damned pig.  They say I'm Anorexic.  Anorexic, my butt.  If I were so Anorexic, I would be losing lots of weight like I used to.  I would be 100 lbs or something.  Don't you think?  I exercise, I even started skipping meals once I got out of treatment and went down to 600 calories.  No dice.  Didn't lose a pound.  What's wrong with my stupid body?  Why can't I just get to a decent weight and stay there?  Not this flabby, blobby, icky weight that I am now.  And don't tell me to exercise.  I already do that.  I'm so sick of this.

Bjork

 Must be wonderful to MOVE!!!!  You can't sue over 30 shock treatments? That's crappy.  I've had several doctors recommend shock treatments for me, but my family has always said "no", thank god.  I'm glad you're doing better!

Bjork

 I have Anorexia.  So in order to lose weight, I take diet pills pretty much every day.  I feel like I can't stop taking them.  My parents have tried to stop me, but usually I end up feeling like I'm "dead to the world" and so I just sneak me some more and hide it in a different location in my room, only for the cycle to begin again.  This has been going on since I was 16 years old and I am now 28.  My parents don't know about my current stash of pills.  I take them not only to lose weight, but to make me who I am.  They make me more outgoing, more friendly, etc.  I can't live without them.  I know they're only diet pills, but is there a possibility that someone could be addicted to them?  I don't think I could live in a world without my pills.

Bjork