Replies to '12/22 Parents Falsely Accused'

Actually to be honest, this analogy doesn't work with me.

I may be alone in this, but I would leave that much cash laying in my car.  I leave cash and checks laying in my front seat all the time.  No one has ever stolen it or broken into my car.  I don't think there are many people out there looking through windows looking for cash to steal.  I'm just not that worried about it. 

I've had my wallet stollen in a bar once, but that's the only time I've ever had any money stolen. 

I know there are tons of bad people out there, and I am the first one not to trust anyone.  And honestly to the ones who mentioned someone watching the kids while they go in to pay for gas.  I've had people offer that to me before and it made me uincomfortable.  It made me think what is there alterior motive.  Are they wanting to steal my kid?  I don't ever trust a stranger. 

But at the same time, I think if you are running in to pay for gas the time it takes a person to see that the child is alone in the car, walk over to it and try to get in you would notice and come flying out the store.  Maybe you guys move like grannies, but I'm pretty sure I could dart a quick 50 ft in no time flat.  Plus if they did get away there are plenty of witnesses in a place like that so I don't worry that too many people are going to try something in that short time.  I know it happens, but I think those instances are rare and also the parents probably are in a place where they can't see the car.  I'll walk out of the store if I see anyone walk near my vehicle.  And yeah, I do this frequently.  I don't see the need in unbuckling two toddlers and dragging them into the store where they can see cookies and candy and cheap plastic toys and start crying for them, when they can just sit tight for a second while you pay.  And actually I usually pay at the punp, but sometimes it doesn't print the reciept and it says to see the cashier for your reciept, so you have to go in for the reciept.  And I go in to buy a pack of ciggarettes.  (before I get jumped on for this, no I don't smoke with them in the car, butI'm usually on my way to drop them at the sitters house on my way to work and I do smoke one on my way from the sitters house to my office.)  But I've never had a problem with it.  And I know first hand from a law enforcement friend, that in the state of Texas, it is legal to leave the child unattended in the car as long as it is not for more than 5 minutes and you can see the vehicle, or if there is a child over the age of 13 in the vehicle with them, then it is legal to leave them longer.  I don't see any problem with what this lady did.  Jeez people come on!  I'm pretty sure she could have gotten back to her car in the 15 seconds it might have taken a car thief or kidnapper to get into her car!  I certainly would have never taken my young child out in that weather, sleeping or not!  The nice warm car was a much better place for the child.  That police officer was way out of line and I'm glad charges were dropped!  Those poor kids should have never had to go through seeing there mother being handcuffed and hauled off to jail!  That kind of thing is traumatic for a child and could really give them an unhealthy fear of law enforcement!  Does no one think about that?  I want my kids to think police are good people, not people that take mommy away!  I just feel really sorry for those kids.  This is something they will remember for the rest of their lives and her charges being dropped will never erase it from their minds.  They will be stuck with this forever!  You can't take things back that children see, so lets be so very careful in what we allow to happen in front of them!  If I were her I would be so angry that the officer had shown such disreguard for what her children might get from the whole experience. 

I do believe in protecting children, but over protecting them makes them fearful and timid, which I wouldn't want my children to be.  I want them to be bold and brave and willing to experience new things, not constantly be worried about wheather they might get hurt or not. 

I will say that I do not trust men and anyone who leaves there children with a man, even a boyfriend are not being very cautios with their children.  Just because you realy never can tell who will be a child molester untill it's already happened and then it's too late the child is already scared for life.

But leaving one a car for a minute is not at all putting your child in danger, unless you're going in somewhere that you won't be able to see them.

I do wonder about those stories of the babies being left in hot cars all day and then dying and the parents saying the forgot the child was in there.  I'm sorry, but I am one the worls bussiest people and always have a million and one things on my mind and I just don't see how it would be possible to forget your child was in the back seat!  HELLO!  I think you would know if you never made that stop at the day care.  I just don't understand it at all. I don't see why they get off scott free.  I think that is a load of bs that they forgot.  I just don't comprehend how that is possible. 

And as for the people complaining about CPS.  I don't think from what I've seen that they are so quick to take peoples kids for no reason.  I do think the foster care system is majorly flawed, but I thjink CPS does a fairly decent job for the most part.  Of course they are human and can be wrong at times, but thats with anything.

I don't trust the foster care system and I think there is a lot of child abuse that goes on in foster homes with nothing done about it and on that end, maybe CPS might need to step it up, but on initial investigations I thinkthey are reasonable.  I think that there is no reason in the world why they shouldn't place a child with a famiy member if there is one willing to take the child and can pass a home inspection and has the financial means to care for them.  It is a disgrace that they don't allow that in most cases.

I had an ex-mother-in-law that harrased me through CPS.  Always making allegations of abuse and neglect.  I was always very pleasant and cooperative with them, always quick to let then speak with my son alone with out me around because I always knew I was innocent.  All allegations where always unfounded and dismissed.  They saw that it was bull and even testified in court on my behalf many time.  Always saying that they had no concerns what so ever about my parenting skills and that my child seemed to be happy and well adjuste4d aside from being tired of being question by stangers (cps case workers) all the time.  After a while a child gets sick of it all and I am angry that my child was put through that.  But I am not angry with cps because it wasn't their fault.  And they did see that she was doing it out of harrasment.  I had one that was a bit unfriendly at first due to the allegations, but as soon as she got into the investigation and started talking to people and observing my child she saw what was going on and dismissed as well.  It even got to the point that I was taking my son downtown to the cps office regularly to see the case workers so they could say they had seen him and all was well.  We got to know them very well.  What a big fiasco that was.  But they taught me to always cover my self, in other words wait for allegations and as soon as they were called out to request they order drug tests on me and that way they could pay for them and I would always have proof of false accusations to take to court with me. And also the taught me to take my son to see a child therapist the did "play therapy" where they get on the floor and play with the child to get into their world and just talk about things as they come up so the child doesn't start to feel they are being invasive or just trying to get something out of him.  I always did this and guess what.  Thereapist always said my child was a happy healthy well adjusted child.  It wasn'ty untill my crazy ex mother-in-law took him to her therapist (that did not do "playtherapy" but talked and asked questions and ininuated things) that they said there seemed to be a problem.  Of course she also spoke with the therapist in private wcich can be a normal thing that happens when a minor is in therapy that the tharapist will talk with the adult in private as well sometimes, which give her the oportunity to say all kinds of sladerous things about me.  Yeah, if you push an idea on a child you can get anything out of them.  You can get reports saying anything you want about a child, you just have to be the one paying the person and the one speaking with them in private and telling the horrible stories. 

So, I think CPS did a great job with us and I think people should realise that too much of this crap can be more harmful to the child. 

Let's say this, if the child is not being beated, starved, molested, raped, talked down to and called nast names then leave them be.  Keep the disputes between the adults, don't use the child to get back at someone.  And don't try to break up a family that is perfectly happy.  It's not fair to the innocent child and causes everyone a lot of unnecesarry pain and grief.  People need to mind there business more and only step in when a child is truely in danger. 

And what is with all these parents trying to take their children's children away?  I don't get that.  My mother always said she had raised her kids and she wasn't raising anyone leses.  You make the baby, you raise it!  When your kids are grown and on there own, those are there years your supposed to look forward to so you can go and things again and be yourself and have a life and just relax and take care of you.  Why would you want to be in your 50's and chasing a toddler around constantly and doping things young mothers do?  doesn't make sense to me.  I love my babies and I love them being babies, but at the same time, I think about how great it will be when they are grown and gone and I can go take a cruise and travel europe and do what I want.  My kids better never expext me to raise their babies cause it's not gonna be happening, unless of course it came to a situation where it was that or foster care, then of course I would step in, but I would fully expect them to be working there butt off to do whatever they had to do to get their child back too.  I woulnd want to replace momma and daddy.  Grandmas are supposed to love them, spoil them and then send them back home with momma and daddy.  People are so wierd now days.  I just don't get all this meddling in other peoples lives that people do.  I'm off my soap box now.