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September 28, 2008, 3:40 pm PDT
PASSING ON THE WORD "ABUSE" FROM A FRIEND
Quote From: housewife52If something had happened to the 9 year old and the mother had admitted that she was trying to teach him to be independent, then this situation might have been viewed differently (by the police,etc...) I wouldn't say it's a form of abuse. But, it's not quite the way I parented. When my kids were that age, and I knew a parent let thier kids have what I would consider "too much unsupervised freedom", I wouldn't have let my kids spend the night, or maybe even go to thier houses. I would have been leery of that. When my kids were elementary and middle school age, I had to know the parents fairly well. By the time they got to high school they were old enough, IMO, to make better judgements than when they were younger. I was fortunate and they DID make good choices. It's not that I chose thier friends when they were younger, I was just picky about where they spent time away from home. I don't think as a mother you ever stop worrying about them as long as they or you, have a pulse. But there just comes a time when you have to begin to let go and eventually let completely go. My kids are now almost 22 and almost 27. And I still worry, but I have completely let go. They make thier own decisions and I give them advice when they ask for it. I KNOW THE WORD "ABUSE" WAS A STRONG WORD IN
THIS SITUATION. A FRIEND GAVE ME
THE WORD TO USE
IN MY MESSAGE.
HER HUSBAND THAT SHE IS NOW DIVORCED FROM NOW, DID SOMETHING SIMILAR TO HER SON.
HE LET HIS 7 YEAR
SON GO SHOPPING ALONE FOR TWO HOURS IN A SHOPPING CENTER GIVING HIM MONEY........
FOR HIM TO LEARN HOW TO SPEND
MONEY ON ITEMS
THAT HE NEEDED... AND LEARN HOW TO TAKE A BUS HOME. WELL UNFORTUNATELY HE WAS JUMPED AND HURT BADLY ALONG WITH HAVING HIS MONEY STOLEN.
IT WAS ONLY THE FATHERS GOAL TO TEACH HIM HOW TO BECOME "INDEPENDENT"
BUT AS I STATED WHAT HE
DID BACKFIRED ON
HIM AND HURT THE ENTIRE FAMILY...SAD BUT TRUE.
YOU ARE A MOTHER THAT HAS BROUGHT YOUR CHILDREN UP PROPERLY WITHOUT
A DOUBT. I THANK
YOU FOR YOUR MESSAGE.
I AM FORTUNATE MY CHILDREN HAVE GROWN TO BE "RESPONSIBLE"
ADULTS AND THEY LEARNED HOW TO BE "INDEPENDENT" WITH HELP FROM US.
WE HAVE ALWAYS BELIEVED "CHILDREN LEARN WHAT THEY LIVE"!!!!!
THE POINT IS, THEIR
IS A PROPER WAY
OF HANDLING HOW CHILDREN SHOULD
BE TAUGHT TO BE INDEPENDENT.
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