Quote From: choirmouse I am married to a cross dresser. I have trouble dealing with this. He didn't tell me this until after our first child was born. Then it became very difficult to be intimate because once he told me, he was very uninhibited and even took off what I had on and put it on himself during sex so he could climax. I felt very unsexy, and was devastated. How can i compete with my clothes? He would then have the guilt attacks and couldn't even face me. We have an understanding now. He has friends who do the same thing and he gets together with them 3-4 times a year. I just don't want to see him when he is dressed as a woman. I love him dearly but cannot endure intimacy with him. It is too painful for both of us. He loves me too and I am sure he is not gay. But I do fear that some day he will decide to truly "cross over". He says this is not that he wants to change his sex but that he just feels more comfortable dressed as a woman. Is that possible? Or is he still suffering from gender confusion? I know I have blinders on but its the best way I know to deal with this.
saw your message as I was replying to the gender confused kid an read yours. Can I say from first hand knowlege and not from some book... Your husband is a man and will always be a man... He's kinky and not homosexual. I have seen and know many cross dressing men who are all heterosexual males with wives they love worship and adore. But the problem these men have is finding someone who can respect their choices and to love them just the same.
Your husband has issues because while you love him as the man you know, he's going to always have issues because he hurt you when giving you the knowlege that he cross dresses. While I know you are hurting and intimacy is difficult, just know, he's not gender confused and what he's saying about being comfortable in woman clothes is true. Non of this has anything to do with your relationship with him. It was'nt anything you did or did'nt do, so you should have no guilt...Its not you.
Just love him as the man you know, let him know how uncomfortable you feel about his dressing in front of you. Allow him this kink which he should do outside the home. You knowing about it and looking at it is two different things. He has friends who no doubt are doing the same thing he is. Just be openminded enough to allow it, but not in your home. Just try to understand him. It will all work out in the end.
If you'd like a friend to vent with, I'm here at goldiestreasures@yahoo.com
