Replies to '12/30 Extreme Discipline?'

I was watching tonights episodes and thought it interesting that the guest was being labeled a child abuser. I think the dynamics of this family were laid out in the first few sentences - the father is not home a lot and is not a part of the daily routine. When he enters the picture he is seen as a n outsider, which he undoubtedly feels, therefore he tries to assert his presence and opinion. One of the points of contention was the night he made her sit without food for the entire night. If you listened to the story you would have heard he told her she could get up when she was ready to talk and she CHOSE to spend the night on the couch. With that being said, it is not UNBELIEVABLE that he said "I am going to break you" because they are in such an obvious power struggle and he is trying to maintain his authority as a parent. His wife has good intentions but the fact the child knows that she would leave him if they continue to fight just lets the child know he doesn't have to listen. This poor kid doesn't have an issue with her father, she has an unbelievable and unfortunate history. They need counseling and other help but to vilify the father and make it his fault is sad.

I just find it unfortunate that if this were a different show Dr. Phil would be telling them that they are the parent and when you have a disrespectful and unruly child you have to stand your ground. He isnt beating her, he isn't trying to undo her emotionally - he is obviously trying to maintain control. If this family is guilty of anything they are guilty of not noticing she is going through something important and band together.

I agree she needs nurturing but that is not contusive with the environment between the parents. They are at odds and that is where the child will find security in themselves and learn about positive relationships.

Bottom line, to say this is as simple as my dad is a hard-ass and that is the root of all evil for this girl is simple minded and ridiculous. The entire FAMILY needs help and no one is doing right by this girl.