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October 24, 2005, 8:23 am PDT

Hi ......

Quote From: crobin

I'm looking for some advice on how to tell my 2 children that there dad and I are getting a divorce. They are 13 and 15 and to my knowledge have no idea. We never fight and any conversations we have are when they are gone. So far my husband and I are agreeing on everything. He has been speaking to a person he met on the internet  for about a year  We started talking about divorce about a month ago. He informed me this week that he is meeting this  friend next month for the first time. But that he has already made plans to move in with her in feburary. I live in michigan she lives in calgary canada, approx 2,000 miles away. He is giving me full custody of the girls. So not only do I have to explain to them thet there father is leaving but that he is moving so far away that they will not be able to see him for awhile. He is a canadian citizen but legal resident of the states so once he moves back to canada he has to give up his residency here in the states. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. 

First, I sympathise with you, and  your children.... 

  

I am a single Dad, have been for 8 years now. 

  

If your husband has any self respect, and love for your children - which I am sure he has, then he needs to tell the children what he intends to do. 

  

You both need to be there and show the kids that you both still love them, as Mum and Dad, because you will always be their Mum and Dad .... no matter what, and tell them together. It will be painfull. Very painfull. 

  

Let the kids ask questions and answer them as best you can.  

  

Maybe they will show anger, contempt, fear, disappointment ......... you need to be strong. 

  

There is soooooo much more I could say, but, I will leave it here.  

  

You are welcome to get in touch if you need a shoulder to lean on, or someone to yell at. 

  

Through your love, and strength, your kids will grow and thrive - believe me. 

  

Good luck and my best wishes go out to you.  Don 

 


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