Replies to 'Childhood Sexual Abuse Support'

Momisme thanks for the welcome back. The problem is I live in Ireland (am I the only non States person on here?) and with the time difference I have to catchup on loads when I get on :)!! I don't think I've had the 20 minute problem but now ye have got me paranoid about it so I'm trying to do this really fast. Luckily I am a computer programmer so I can type fairly quickly (can't spell to save my life though so sorry for the typos!)

MJ (what does your name mean?) I'm really sorry about your mother, she sounds awful. I don't think there is anything wrong with you not wanting to be at her funeral unless it hyrts you ultimately. My mother is one of the most self obsesed people you could meet. She didn't do the awful things your mother did but she abused us in so many other ways and she set up and environment that led to my brother abusing me. I hate her more than anything but I still want a mother and that is really hard to let go of. Maybe when I have kids of my own it will be easier.

My Dad died recently and before he died I thought I was going to cut off contact with her after it was all over. But I haven't. I still ring her becuase I feel sorry for her. She is all alone and I know that is her fault but I wouldn't want to see anyone in that position. The thing is I was talking to her yesterday and she wants to come visit me and there is no way I can let her. Apart from the way she makes me feel she is horrible tomy husband and it is his house too. The thing is that I can't get up the courage to tell her she's not welcome. I don't want the fight but I also don't want to hurt her. So now I'm stressing again! Which right now I don't need. Here I am telling Oreo to be brave and I can't face my own problems.

The relationship with your mother is sooooooo important and I think it is a real problem for people when that is not how it should be. I've been trying for more than 3 years to have a baby. They can't find a physical problem and my therapist thinks its because I don't feel worthy enough to be a mother. He could be right. I still don't like the person I am so how could I be a good mother. She has effected every facet of my life and I still can't cut her out.

When she dies I am going to the funeral to dance at her grave!

Momisme thanks for the welcome back. The problem is I live in Ireland (am I the only non States person on here?) and with the time difference I have to catchup on loads when I get on :)!! I don't think I've had the 20 minute problem but now ye have got me paranoid about it so I'm trying to do this really fast. Luckily I am a computer programmer so I can type fairly quickly (can't spell to save my life though so sorry for the typos!)

MJ (what does your name mean?) I'm really sorry about your mother, she sounds awful. I don't think there is anything wrong with you not wanting to be at her funeral unless it hyrts you ultimately. My mother is one of the most self obsesed people you could meet. She didn't do the awful things your mother did but she abused us in so many other ways and she set up and environment that led to my brother abusing me. I hate her more than anything but I still want a mother and that is really hard to let go of. Maybe when I have kids of my own it will be easier.

My Dad died recently and before he died I thought I was going to cut off contact with her after it was all over. But I haven't. I still ring her becuase I feel sorry for her. She is all alone and I know that is her fault but I wouldn't want to see anyone in that position. The thing is I was talking to her yesterday and she wants to come visit me and there is no way I can let her. Apart from the way she makes me feel she is horrible tomy husband and it is his house too. The thing is that I can't get up the courage to tell her she's not welcome. I don't want the fight but I also don't want to hurt her. So now I'm stressing again! Which right now I don't need. Here I am telling Oreo to be brave and I can't face my own problems.

The relationship with your mother is sooooooo important and I think it is a real problem for people when that is not how it should be. I've been trying for more than 3 years to have a baby. They can't find a physical problem and my therapist thinks its because I don't feel worthy enough to be a mother. He could be right. I still don't like the person I am so how could I be a good mother. She has effected every facet of my life and I still can't cut her out.

When she dies I am going to the funeral to dance at her grave!