Quote From: gailrensI had lived with an insecure mom who would tear apart anything my step-mom did. The problem was that the step mom was younger and pretty and a great person. It wasn't for years later at my sister's wedding that my mom stopped being threatened by my step mom. And it was because of the way my step mom treated her that I believe calmed all her insecurities. They never really talked face to face before. My step mom asked my mom about things in her life and turned the conversation into building her up and how great she was and what a beatiful home she had. It took some time but whenever they would meet all they ever talked about was my mom and what she was doing and things in her life. Now my step mom has visited with me and my sister to my mom's cottage. And my step mom does my mom's hair. They are not best friends, but my mom has stopped the step mom bashing.
Kindness can take a lot of effort on your part. I hope you can reach her.
For your family it will be worth it.
g
Thanks for the advice. I doubt I would ever have an opportunity to have a nice conversation with mom. She threatened me via email and phone messages one threat was, "I hope you are secure in your relationship because I will be the woman in the back of your head by the end of summer." this was before she had even met me or heard my voice.
My husband has a restraining order against her for domestic violence.
My stepchildren love to goof off with me. We go to the park and roll down the hills. We play games. I'm like a big kid when we have fun. I am also a role model and have expectations out of them. I listen when they speak and ask them how do they feel rather than tell them how I feel when it comes to a problem, especially with their mother.
Their mother doesn't do this. She often tells them how they should feel. She's always busy watching TV or socializing with her friends.
