Quote From: pad1gett Since I don't know the details of this breakup, I will withhold comment except to say I wish people would try harder to repair damaged marriages instead of selfishly ending them without trying all avenues. I was told when I married that at 16, you have made your bed. Now lie in it and I have for 53 years without regret. There were times it would have been easier to just say good-bye and leave but we knew we saw something in each other and neither of us strayed outside marriage when things got tough. In fact, I can't remember when things weren't tough but we muddled through and our family was intact and we have earned the happiness we have found. I would encourage the daughters to go forward. It never helps to hold a grudge. Seek help in understanding the why in this case.
Aunita Padgett Orlando Florida
I agree you should try to work things out before this one big step. As Dr. Phil says, you have to earn your way out. But how much is one supposed to take before you decide there isn't enough to work on or with?
I was widowed at 35. At 40, I met my current boyfriend and we've been living together for 7 years, engaged for 4+. I suppose we've always felt something was not quite right, or at least I have, because the "M" word has not been mentioned more than four or five times since our engagement. He has been verbally abusive throughout our relationship. He refuses to engage in any way with my grown daughter and her family. He recently vented his frustration at my lack of affection toward him. I told him I hadn't felt like he had any desire for me and he confessed that he isn't attracted to me any more (but thinks it's maybe a "7 year itch"). We agreed to try and mend our relationship but he still admitted that even if things get better, he's still not sure he'll be satisfied. He has a way of making all our problems about me and I need to somehow be fixed. Thinking back, there have been signals over the past three or so years that the attraction is waning. I know in my heart that even if we get "through" this period, it will again deteriorate, as has been the cycle. I am truly unhappy and hurt by his rejection of me and find it isn't possible to feel anything for him. I love him, but not in a romantic way any more. I could see us just being friends, but I think I deserve more from a marriage.
