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Replies to 'Tired of Being Single'
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December 11, 2005, 12:10 pm PST
 Quote From: nahmi2005 Here it goes: I've met a guy, it's like meeting me, he seems great, attractive, good sense of humor, good job, etc., etc., he's asked me out, but due to circumstances on both our parts we haven't had the first date yet, it been postponed?. It has taken a year to get this far people! I was attracted to him right away. I didn't know if he was single or not. We'd see each other in the community, say hello. I've got to admit I've had a lot going on in my life in the past year, lots of changes. I honestly wouldn't have had the time to give someone. Now I do, we just began flirting a couple of months ago and he just asked me out two weeks ago. No rush on my part either. I've given him my phone number, he hasn't called. I've called him twice, both conversations were great, we talked for an hour. He comes out to my job to visit me and stops in to visit over the noon hour on a daily basis. I am 51, single, not bad looking, divorced since 1981, had some skirmishes but I wasn't a 'gift' at the time either. I am so out of practice, I don't have a clue what to do next. How do I get to the first date? HELP ME! And yes I've read 'he's just not that into you" there's definitely some grrrrrrrrrrr going on here. I need advice. Do I keep calling, do I back off? There are other interested fellas, just not my type (drinkers, players, etc.) Anyway I'm ready to take it to deep like (no sex). Anybody....somebody....? Been there, done that, got the license plate!! Ask him out. Yup. I know, I know, I know.
This is what works for me ... I find out the type of movie he likes. When a good, new movie within that genre' comes out I ask if he saw the trailer for it. If he says yes we discuss the trailer. Of course, I have done my homework and I know all anyone could ever know about it. If he says no, I tell him all about it.
My conversation is excited and animated. I announce again when it will be in the theatres. Pause... Sometimes they ask me if I want to see it with them. Sometimes I have to give the extra push and say... What do you think? Pause... Sometimes they get it and they ask. If not I push again... Would that be something you'd be interested in seeing? If they say no. I say I'll have to find someone else to see it with and move on with my conversation.
I always have a plan to talk about something else so that it is not too awkward, and he may see that I am still worth a date. If he says yes I ask if Friday or Saturday is better for him. I just assume that when he said yes he was agreeing to see it with me. I have never had anyone back out at that point but if they did I would flat out ask if they would be interested in seeing any movie with me. If they said no I would again move on to my back-up conversation and then not initiate any thing more with them.
But good googly moogly the man visits you everyday at lunch!! Poor thing is probably scared to death to ask you out!!
Hugs, Kindle |
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January 5, 2006, 7:25 pm PST
Quote From: nahmi2005 Here it goes: I've met a guy, it's like meeting me, he seems great, attractive, good sense of humor, good job, etc., etc., he's asked me out, but due to circumstances on both our parts we haven't had the first date yet, it been postponed?. It has taken a year to get this far people! I was attracted to him right away. I didn't know if he was single or not. We'd see each other in the community, say hello. I've got to admit I've had a lot going on in my life in the past year, lots of changes. I honestly wouldn't have had the time to give someone. Now I do, we just began flirting a couple of months ago and he just asked me out two weeks ago. No rush on my part either. I've given him my phone number, he hasn't called. I've called him twice, both conversations were great, we talked for an hour. He comes out to my job to visit me and stops in to visit over the noon hour on a daily basis. I am 51, single, not bad looking, divorced since 1981, had some skirmishes but I wasn't a 'gift' at the time either. I am so out of practice, I don't have a clue what to do next. How do I get to the first date? HELP ME! And yes I've read 'he's just not that into you" there's definitely some grrrrrrrrrrr going on here. I need advice. Do I keep calling, do I back off? There are other interested fellas, just not my type (drinkers, players, etc.) Anyway I'm ready to take it to deep like (no sex). Anybody....somebody....? Here's an update and the deal breaker people! He drinks, no he binge drinks. I have 14 years of recovery as of January 18, 1992, my biological birthday also, so this can't happen, even if he decided to quit right now, I won't put my life on hold to 'wait and see' if he can sober up. I read Dr. Phil's book, I feel stronger and better. I haven't got a complete plan as of yet, but as I keep re-reading parts, I'm getting it. I know what the 80% will be. I will meet my husband ...soon. Today I got eye-kisses from a Robert Redford look-a-like! That felt great! YESSSS!!!! More later |
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