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Replies to 'Getting Along With Your In-Laws'
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August 13, 2005, 5:39 am PDT
 Quote From: jenoc99 In your first post, you wrote regarding your brother in law: "Well he called me back about 3 hours later, livid at me and my husband, he was mad at her as well, but wanted to jump on us for being in her email. Well i told him that he needed to talk to his borther, my husband about this. So anyways she hates us now, doesn't want to be around us, and is ruining this famliy and I don't know how to handle this, we all have kids."
You didn't say that everything was now fine in your first post, from reading it, what I thought you were saying was that although you and your husband went to great lengths to prove your SIL was cheating, etc., it was for nothing because her husband didn't believe it. You asked how can you get over it in your first post, and my advice to you was to be happy for all that you have and find a way to let it all go. Your response is I shouldn't be questioning your actions/reactions, etc...(which by the way, the questions were rhetorical- just things for you to think about, I didn't mean I wanted to answers) but you are the one who asked for advice on a message board, if you don't like the advice you receive, then don't take it. When you ask for advice, you aren't always going to hear what you want to hear.
You don't have to be friends with these people. It can be difficult when you live in a small town, but things have a way of blowing over, and with time, the person who tells lies and spreads gossip will be figured out, because when she doesn't get the reaction she wants out of you, she will move on to push someone else's buttons, and before you know it she will have dug her own grave, you don't have to help her do it. But like you said, you aren't the type of person to just let things go. Jen I didn't think people could shock me as much as the post from renaentx. I think you were right on with you answer to this lady. I was in shock when I read how far she went to PROVE herself right. The first on her reply to you was to say.....
I do aggree with you that we have spent ALOT of time checking up on her and proveing what we new was true, and that it seems a little on the stalking side as you say,
Then she goes on in the same message to say:
I didn't devote as much time as you think I did, it takes all of 5 minutes to turn on a computer and print an email and be done
Invasion of privacy are she. That is really going overboard. To me that should be a criminal offence. I certainly do NOT think adultery is good. But what happened was between her HUSBAND and HERSELF and had NOTHING to do with the sister-in-law nor the brother-in-law. If it bothered her so much why couldn't she talk to her only and tell her if it didn't stop immedietly then she would tell the husbands brother. It seems to me that she is the reason and cause of all of this heartbreak in her family. But it wasn't her concern at all. She sure proved she were right...but it seems to me it didn't matter who she hurt in the process. I do understand she wanted to protect her brother-in-laws assets. But doing what she did is just so wrong. And the only thing that happaned is the family is in tormoil and now the bro-in-law nor the sis-in-law want anything to do with her.(go figure) Now that to me seems justified. How would she feel if someone was stealing mail from her and copying it and reading it??? Yea I know.......her response to me would be...I don't care... Well this is just my two cents worth. I have nothing to hide at all. If my husband wants to invade my privacy and read my emails that's fine...because he is MY husband...plus he doesn't need to because I generally print them out and leave them around anyway. And to say she would do it again. I feel very sad for her. I really just wanted you to know jen that I totally agree with you on this. You were right on with your advice and I think you handled what you said very well. Notice I am writing this to you and not her. Because I could NOT handle myself as well as you did when she responded to you. |
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