Quote From: jennife72well that is the case with me and my son
i am a single parent and it is just me and my son in the home
i think it will changed once me and my fiance get married in the fall of next year and purchase a house
he has no respect for me at times
he will talk back and when i tell him something it is like i have not said a word
what do you think?
will that make it change?
we have been together for almost 3 yrs and he does not live with us
but i think it will change when we all are under the same roof
my fiance even thinks that
let me know
While having a male role model should help, I don't think simply moving in together and changing your last name will fix the problem. First et me ask, have you and your fiance talked about how you are going to parent your son? You both NEED to be on the same page so that you can be consistant, otherwise he'll learn some behaviors are ok and times when one or the other parent isn't present. Second of all, talking back: Have you tried time out? If you have, have you been doing it correctly? Here are a get guidlines.
1) Time out should be short. There are two variations of this a) 1 minute for every year old they are or b) 2 minutes plus 3 seconds for each year. Either way a time out shouldn't be 1/2 an hour.
2) Time out should be in boring place. "Go to your room!" is a really bad way to send a kid to time out, there's plenty of stuff in a kids room to find ammusment with. The point of time out is to remove anny reiforcement. So, find a place that is out of reach from anything and is facing a wall. Place a chair or mat there and designate this place for time out.
3) Time out doesn't start until the child quietly sitting. If they get up or talk, time out starts over. If they get up you may need to physically place them back on the chair. But you need to stick to it!
4) Do not talk to the child while they are in time out. That doesn't mean don't talk to them at all if you need to tel them to go back to the chair when they get up, or if you need to tell them to you have restarted time out. But, don't carry on a conversation.
5) After the time is up, tell the child why they got a time out, that the behavior is not ok, tell them to say they are sorry. Only then shoud you hug them.
If you follow these rules, and really stick to it, there is no reason your son should talk back to you anymore.
