Replies to '01/05 "Am I Cursed?"'

Hi Terri, 

I think that this is the point where some give and take is needed so to speak.  In life I have often found that when two are at odds, sometimes strickness is not the best alternative.  I can see that you understand the environment on Native American reservations today.  I am extremely grateful for the compassion and sharing that I have experienced since my return home.   

I was not raised with my family, due to circumstances beyond my control.  I was born in 1952 and immediately taken from my Native American parents, because they were Indians.  I was then placed in a non-Native home and raised to be white.  I learned to live with the life that I had been placed in and did fairly well for myself.  Finally, at the age of 40 I broke the chains of adoption and began a search for my "real" family.  After thinking that this would be costly and may take a long time I prepared my self for that.  To my complete surprise I was talking to my oldest sister only 45 minutes later.  It was not until 1998, that my husband of 29+ years and I moved across the country to be closer to my family.  I have been spending the past 7+ yrs surviving and living with my relatives.  When we got here I had a job with the tribe, after all I had always had a job.  Not always had a place to live but always had a job.  Within three months I had become so ill that I was fired from my tribal job and my world turned upside down.   

Before coming home I have often thought I knew the meaning of words like: prejudice, hate, etc.  I had no idea, as most people who live in the cities do not have.  I could give you the defination of the words but to understand the pain and extreme anger, I had much to learn.  Over the past 7+ yrs my life has gone totally out to a zero income for an extended period of time, to a place now where I am better health wise.  Three years ago I was diagnosed with IBS, Acid Reflux, Digestive Disorders, and PTSD.  Today I do ok due to the small allotment from the SSDI.  I have also completed a degree in Environmental Science  with honors, from our tribal college.  I believe that we all can bounce back but some people do not have the courage or strength to try one more time.   

I appreciate your post and understand that the message you were sending.  I do agree that sometimes we get lost in our everyday lives and forget there is a world out there.  Maybe there is a way to disagree and agree at the same time.  I sorry if my message has caused you any offense. 

Whispering Eagle