Replies to '03/23 Nasty Custody Battles'

Erin, I admire you and your husband for lasting this long.  I was never in that perdicament.  My real dad left when my mom was pregnant.  The dad that I grew up with was my stepfather, both families got along great.   My biological father, has never even tried to reach me.  The only thing that he did that was good was leave when my mom was pregnant.  My biological father took one of my brothers with him  and for the first time the whole family met the oldest of our family when i was 14.  It was strange to see him because we all look alike.  So for your perdicament, the best thing that I can think of is go to court, but leave the kids with a babysitter unless the judge wants to talk to them.  The children should not be in the middle as they are now.  Your husbands ex is making the children call their stepfather "daddy" which is not right at all.  My two stepdaughters asked me WHAT I wanted them to call me, I told them anything you want.  I also told them that by no means am I taking the place of their mother.  I  told them as close that I can come to that is being your friend and stepmother.  That seemed to the kids at ease....maybe try something like that but only to the ex, she might think that you and your husband want to take the kids from here.    Letters don't always work.  I feel for you both, I cannot even think, of doing to those little children who need their biological dad.   

I hope everything works out for you and your husband 

Pandas (Cheryl)