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August 10, 2005, 9:21 am PDT
Spanking: Useful or Cruel?
Quote From: kdabamHow can you say " do not mean to offend" but then go on with your post and be offensive? I read over some of your old posts and saw you have no problem with expressing your self. The nature of debating always creates offensiveness. That's how it is. That's ok. don't apologize for it. It only makes your statements less creditable. State what you mean clearly (don't bounce back and forth between ideas and never really take a side so that way you can get out of it by apologizing) and let the dust settle where it may. You said in your last post that non spankers are wishy washy. That wasn't stated anywhere in the original post. This mom was asking for help (through her cousin) with her child that physicians were not giving her any help with and you went on and demeaned advice[that was meant to help with your own insecurities. I do agree that some parent's may not discipline due to a disorder. I am dealing with that in my own family. But that wasn't the case here. If you want to debate. I'll debate but lets get the facts straight first.
talk to you soon
I honestly do not remeber saying "non spankers" are wishy washy I think parents who don't discipline, use excuses not to discipline or for their children's behavior arre the wishy washy ones. And I have taken a stand, I am not against spanking so I guess I stand on that side BUT I do not think spanking should be used on every bad behavior that parents need to be opened to other disciplines and I do not care whether a parent spanks or not, the issue is to love and discipline our children to help teach and guide them and if parents are doing this, then I have respect for them. and as I have said many times, I know parents on both sides of the issue and they are good parents with good kids, the way their kids turn out is not neccaessarily based on whether or not they were spanked but it comes down to so many othere factors as well. It seems like no matter what I say or think, you are going to be offended, I apologized for posting the post where I did and if you would look at the title of that post, "so what is a wishy washy parent," I was defining my opinion on that. but I will not apoloigize for being the good parent that I am and I am not going to back down on my beliefs. I am not going to debate you becasue I have stated what I believe and I stand by ALL parents who love, respect and care for their kids regardless of the discipline techniques that they use. I have a group of friends from these boards who I communicate with on a regular basis, there are about 8 of us, some are for spanking and some are not but we have formed a friendship and we chat and talk on the phine and we share our family experiences and everything in between. We get a long wonderful and most of us met on this spanking board. We get along becasue we respect each other as parents and friends, we may differ on paretning techniques, whether it be spanking, schooling, bed times, what ever, we get along and believe me, I am not that mean spirited person that you think I am. I am sorry again for offending you but I am not sorry for sticking up for people on both sides of the issue and I will continue to believe that spanking is ok, even though I don't use it much! And yes, you are right, I don't have a problem expressing my self and when I see the need to apologize I will do that as well. So if I understand you right, you think it is wrong to stick upo for both sides of the issue and because I do this, I am not taking a stand. Well, I have spanked so that in itself should be enough to say that I am on that side of the issue but again, I have absolutely no problem with the othre side. I will be gone for the rest of the week so I will not be on much. maybe tonight, not sure, depends on what we (family) decides to get into today.
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