Replies to 'The Meaning of "Family"'

...this to get in touch with people with the same background as me. Beacuse this small family that I got makes me feel very low and very insecure. I fell always like I am alone in the world and that I can't make it due to the fact that I didn't get all the tools that other people get when they have bigger families. I try so hard, but all I think is about me bing so "small-family" and everyone is having so much more support then me. Even my parents do not understand all the tings I want to do in life and they do not suppoft everything I do. I have moved from home and feel that I still have to prove myself as a better girl then I can be infront of my parents. They ony had one change and if I blew it all the time as they might see me failing at times. It is so hard. I want to become a sucess and I wan't to become something but all the negative feelings of this kind is holding me back. Why can a family tht felt so loving and so warm, all of a sudden become so cold and so tricky to understand? Is it only me growing to be an adult or what? Is it just me falling off a dream that used to be mine? I feel like the sad little monster arround people due to all this. I feel like I do not belong anywere. And it is worse at Christmas and have been for some time. since it is all about big families and such. I feel trapped into my skin. Become lazy and paralyzed by all the thoughts of never getting out of this inner trurmoil! I do have a boyfriend but under the sircomstances I am under right now as a young student I can't live under the same roof with him. I want to get rid of my goast before I move with him. Please hear my plea. Help me with some other things then just the regular "Think positive" words. Because I sure try, but turn sick all the time. Either depressed or getting a tiny ache anywere or something like that! 

Love alcedo