Replies to 'Workplace Bullies'

oh how nice to know I'm not alone and I wasn't going crazy! 

I started as a temp in a one person office - after only 2 months, my boss asked if I would like to be hired on permanent. It seemed like a good idea at the time. The two of us seemed to hit it off great...so great, she would often spend two or three hours in the morning talking to me about everyone and everything...the things she told me about her daughter, I would be embarassed to even think about concerning my daughter! I often asked her how I was doing, and she would always say great, fabulous, no need to change anything, keep up the good work. But I saw how she treated other people, so friendly and supportive to their face but behind their back she would say awful things. I knew I was not immune to this treatment. I felt like I was going crazy, and my mind couldn't take the uncertainty any more. My boss told me that I do this to myself. I took a week off for "sick time" and used that to try and tell myself my boss was right, I do it to myself, hang in there, straighten out my thinking and everything would be all right. After 2 1/2 years, I finally got a performance review (from the board of directors who tried to tell me my boss had little input, yet my boss was the only one who would know how I work, the board didn't work in the office) and was apalled! My lieu time and sick days were taken away, as well as other changes to "policy". Hmm, if they only knew the things my boss did! 

Things got worse. Finally, as Dr. Phil says in "self matters", I woke up up to something, called BS on it and was stunned that I had been suckered for so long! Finding notes my boss and the vice president of the board of directors were writing literally five feet behind my back was the last straw. One of the notes said "what is she working on" - my point proven, there's no communication to my face, but lots behind my back! I called my boss on it, then marched over and called the vice president on it. I was "laid off" two days later! I was very relieved to be out of there. However, I had the opportunity to listen in on the next board meeting, and was horrified at the nasty, horrible untrue things my boss was saying! She sure knew how to make herself look like the poor boss who had to endure such crap from an employee. If they only knew!!!!!! 

The next year (2005) was the worse year I ever had. I wanted revenge and was angry, resentful, depressed, menopausal,  going through a mid-life crisis with a bout of empty nest syndrome! I've made some big changes in my life, am working through "self matters" and now I'm reading all this, and thank-you so much everyone for writing, it's helping me to feel better, knowing there really are bullies in the workplace and it's not just my own craziness that did this to me.  That website, bullies online is very good too. thanks everyone for sharing.