Replies to 'Infidelity'

Quote From: leettak

My husband and I were separated and are trying to reconcile.  He had a relationship with someone else.  I was lead to believe, by him, that it didnt mean anything to him.  That she was there to keep him from being lonley.  I am okay with that.  I can work on that part.  Now I have found out that he bought her a diamond and ask her to marry him.  He said it was in an affort to keep her around.  She says they were in love and happy.  He says she is saying that so I wont want to be with him anymore.  That all he ever thought of was me.  She was a way for him to pretend he was still with me.    Is that possible?   It sounds crazy to me.  I cant bond with him again because of it.  Pretending that you are with someone?   How does that work?   I know it was not me he was thinking of when he walked into the jewelery store.  He said it was to show off.  I have been with the man for 18 years.   I dont want to flush this down the tubes.    I am lost and confused.  I am not sure what to ask him or what I need to know from him.  Is it possible to live that way for a year?  The questions I ask are stale and have been answered by the same words so many times that I know the answers already.  How can I break through this sale mate to start to heal again.  We were separated for four years.  Still married.  Neither ever tried to get a divorce.  We have been back together for four monthes now.  I feel like I am the other woman, not the wife.   But he maintains that he always loved me.   I want so to believe that.  I cant.  someone please take a minute to tell me my doubts are warrented at least.  I pre- thank you...