Replies to 'Staying Sick or Exaggerating for the Payoff?'

Hi! Wow and no you are not mentally ill or a hypocon, sounds like you are pretty brave. Sound like, the family is suffering from the ME Syndrome, this is my philosophy. They fear the worse, and that is not a feeling that fits into their life. It has to do with this time in history, no one has time, no one gives as our parents and grandparent did in compassion and care for the sick. The clock is turned to tightly, and you are just another worry. They are so blessed, and see us as lazy, and lofters, but that is their issue, not yours, not your problem seek friends, you have one here.  

I know I sound bitter, but it is not true, I as others, want to be loved, and cared for with illness, not control, but respected as an intellegent human being. We would give anything to pop-up and dress-up and run to work. Who wants to live on Social Security at less than 750.00 a month, my rent is more than half that, I made good money in my profession, I loved a new challenge, socializing with people. It was leaving because I became unable to walk, to get in an out of my chair, the pain and stiffness, not meds were working. I 've tried to work and it does not work for me, working at home would, but there is no valid , honest company too trust. I have some law, I am a pre-law BA student, and know the score. Financially, starting a business is not affordable, loans and credit are dishonest when you are ill and on SSI.  

What I would not give to be tired from working all day, than to be tired from being blood deficient or a disease is sucking the life out of me.  

People as Dr Phil says, "GET REAL" who is have the greater problem with our illness, us, I do not think so, I think they make it harder for us. My Brother I cannot even talk to him or his wife they always judge, yes the doctor made mistakes, so have you, and I did not just relay on just his opinion, no one seeks as much opinions as I do. I am tough on it and make sure, I have been burned, but I do not have a PhD nor a MD. Neither of us are God, and they are well, health, and those are usually the ones with all the answes. But I have seen it after 20 years in the medical field, when it comes their time, they fall a part. No one can make them think different, it is through life experiences that we change and grow.  My favor saying is "the best raised kids are by thos that have had none. I lvied with someone like that, they had no clue, if your really sick how do you get up and take care of them, "she said, I could not do that with my illness", my answer ,"yes you would," "those are your children", "they need you, just as if they were going to drowned without you" "you get up and go back to bed on their naps", you die to you when someone is there to take over. Then you crash in bed.  So, do you a favor, find a Crohen support group. They know what it is too be sick, to have a chronic illness and they will help with daily life, with mental health, and with loving support that understands it for real.  

Your weight, get Dr. Phils book, I have lost over 100 pounds , I have the picutres to prove it. But it was before his book, but based on the same philosophy. You have to eat right for ever, and eat healthier, we are what we eat.  It is not a crime to have a piece of chocolate cake, but that and about 2 fruits and three vegables would be the whole days food allowance. You will fail at that, it is a sure failure. So, if you occassionally three time a month feel like you want that, then have protien , like a bioled egg and lunch a low calorie choice, and dinner a vegable and meat , and small piece of cake share it with your hubby , give him the larger piece. I know Crohon is limited in diet, my sister and newphew have it, he wa 12 and no is in remission for years , do too surgery. She is having a terrible time, it is her diet , her life style, rush, rush and time and clock, this make the gastoric juices flow, the constant stress. Stress is a bad thing , too any disease, it will make it ten time worse.  

I started to paint and right down, ideas for fashions for men and woman, with augmentations. It is a stressless time and leaves , me too develop my gifts.  I am an activist for people with chronic illness, writing to Washington on line, through the National Pain Foundation, and for several other well known issues. Busy, but important stress less busy is a good thing. While I am sitting here typing, I am listening to a basketball hit the ground in front of my house, I live across from a park on the waterfront. This fellow is in his forties, he has Tuiresettes. he yells and twist uncontrolled, he is out there every day. Even in the snow, because we are in the north east, he clear the court with a shovel. He is like a Globe Trotter. He has over ten years become a great basketball player. He twist but has mastered his movement's to his timing.  

We have too master our movements with our disease, if that is not understood, it is like today is not a day for me to go up and down the stairs doing laundry, I am too painfull and stiff, but yesterday was a better day. But today I have to do something, maybe I will paint of write , even if I only can do it for a while now and maybe later tonight I will try to move around more. I have sisters, that live like this, we are not quiters, we have a disease, but we remind us that it does not have me. Do what you can, without harming your condition. You know when, you no how much, the heck with peoples opinions, there is an old saying, there like butts, everyone has one,  theyare not always worth off what comes out in the way of compassion.  

Be tough, strong in your heart, and be what you know, your can be. I will pray for your family's hearts, as I do my own. But I can tell you, I still live my life the way i can. Yes , "it hurts" families are the last one too hurt us and gossip to others, in the family and outside what they think. An people swollow that stuff, and do not see the shallowness in their judgement. When I hear someone say, I love them but, that BUT is my que to leave silently, cause here it comes,  love does not have butts, or maybe it does.  

Dr. Phil's book I have had some good laughs with a friend. It has the past me and the remience of the present me, so I still have some issues as we all do. If we were perfect we would have entered into the pearly gates already, we would not need to work anything else out.  

God Bless 

Extreme206 

Hi! Wow and no you are not mentally ill or a hypocon, sounds like you are pretty brave. Sound like, the family is suffering from the ME Syndrome, this is my philosophy. They fear the worse, and that is not a feeling that fits into their life. It has to do with this time in history, no one has time, no one gives as our parents and grandparent did in compassion and care for the sick. The clock is turned to tightly, and you are just another worry. They are so blessed, and see us as lazy, and lofters, but that is their issue, not yours, not your problem seek friends, you have one here.  

I know I sound bitter, but it is not true, I as others, want to be loved, and cared for with illness, not control, but respected as an intellegent human being. We would give anything to pop-up and dress-up and run to work. Who wants to live on Social Security at less than 750.00 a month, my rent is more than half that, I made good money in my profession, I loved a new challenge, socializing with people. It was leaving because I became unable to walk, to get in an out of my chair, the pain and stiffness, not meds were working. I 've tried to work and it does not work for me, working at home would, but there is no valid , honest company too trust. I have some law, I am a pre-law BA student, and know the score. Financially, starting a business is not affordable, loans and credit are dishonest when you are ill and on SSI.  

What I would not give to be tired from working all day, than to be tired from being blood deficient or a disease is sucking the life out of me.  

People as Dr Phil says, "GET REAL" who is have the greater problem with our illness, us, I do not think so, I think they make it harder for us. My Brother I cannot even talk to him or his wife they always judge, yes the doctor made mistakes, so have you, and I did not just relay on just his opinion, no one seeks as much opinions as I do. I am tough on it and make sure, I have been burned, but I do not have a PhD nor a MD. Neither of us are God, and they are well, health, and those are usually the ones with all the answes. But I have seen it after 20 years in the medical field, when it comes their time, they fall a part. No one can make them think different, it is through life experiences that we change and grow.  My favor saying is "the best raised kids are by thos that have had none. I lvied with someone like that, they had no clue, if your really sick how do you get up and take care of them, "she said, I could not do that with my illness", my answer ,"yes you would," "those are your children", "they need you, just as if they were going to drowned without you" "you get up and go back to bed on their naps", you die to you when someone is there to take over. Then you crash in bed.  So, do you a favor, find a Crohen support group. They know what it is too be sick, to have a chronic illness and they will help with daily life, with mental health, and with loving support that understands it for real.  

Your weight, get Dr. Phils book, I have lost over 100 pounds , I have the picutres to prove it. But it was before his book, but based on the same philosophy. You have to eat right for ever, and eat healthier, we are what we eat.  It is not a crime to have a piece of chocolate cake, but that and about 2 fruits and three vegables would be the whole days food allowance. You will fail at that, it is a sure failure. So, if you occassionally three time a month feel like you want that, then have protien , like a bioled egg and lunch a low calorie choice, and dinner a vegable and meat , and small piece of cake share it with your hubby , give him the larger piece. I know Crohon is limited in diet, my sister and newphew have it, he wa 12 and no is in remission for years , do too surgery. She is having a terrible time, it is her diet , her life style, rush, rush and time and clock, this make the gastoric juices flow, the constant stress. Stress is a bad thing , too any disease, it will make it ten time worse.  

I started to paint and right down, ideas for fashions for men and woman, with augmentations. It is a stressless time and leaves , me too develop my gifts.  I am an activist for people with chronic illness, writing to Washington on line, through the National Pain Foundation, and for several other well known issues. Busy, but important stress less busy is a good thing. While I am sitting here typing, I am listening to a basketball hit the ground in front of my house, I live across from a park on the waterfront. This fellow is in his forties, he has Tuiresettes. he yells and twist uncontrolled, he is out there every day. Even in the snow, because we are in the north east, he clear the court with a shovel. He is like a Globe Trotter. He has over ten years become a great basketball player. He twist but has mastered his movement's to his timing.  

We have too master our movements with our disease, if that is not understood, it is like today is not a day for me to go up and down the stairs doing laundry, I am too painfull and stiff, but yesterday was a better day. But today I have to do something, maybe I will paint of write , even if I only can do it for a while now and maybe later tonight I will try to move around more. I have sisters, that live like this, we are not quiters, we have a disease, but we remind us that it does not have me. Do what you can, without harming your condition. You know when, you no how much, the heck with peoples opinions, there is an old saying, there like butts, everyone has one,  theyare not always worth off what comes out in the way of compassion.  

Be tough, strong in your heart, and be what you know, your can be. I will pray for your family's hearts, as I do my own. But I can tell you, I still live my life the way i can. Yes , "it hurts" families are the last one too hurt us and gossip to others, in the family and outside what they think. An people swollow that stuff, and do not see the shallowness in their judgement. When I hear someone say, I love them but, that BUT is my que to leave silently, cause here it comes,  love does not have butts, or maybe it does.  

Dr. Phil's book I have had some good laughs with a friend. It has the past me and the remience of the present me, so I still have some issues as we all do. If we were perfect we would have entered into the pearly gates already, we would not need to work anything else out.  

God Bless 

Extreme206