Replies to 'Grandparents Raising Grandchildren'
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February 23, 2006, 11:10 pm PST
 Quote From: twomanics I think that Dr.Phil should do a show on all of us grandparents who are doing the right thing. There are questions all of us have ie: what do we say to the children when they ask WHY their parents can't/won't take care of them OR would it be better to move children that have lived with grandchildren for several years to younger family members who are willing and able to raise them. What about abandonment issues? Teens being raised by grandparents. Visitation?
Yes I agree that everyday I look into my beautiful granddaughters eyes (Kaylin 6 years and Kyah 3 years) I say Thank God we were there to help...but gosh dang it I wish they had their God given rights which is to be raised by the 2 individuals who CHOSE to have them.......and get the whole experience with us as the Grandparents..with all the fun attached to that. I always shake my head at people who say "Aren't they lucky they have you?" and think....how could I have lived with myself and NOT taken them. Today I cry as a grandmother and a mother. Where did I go wrong what could I have done different my heart is so broken for my grandbabies I think I made the wrong choices in having children. I have my oldest grandson who is now 5 and I he came to live with me when he was 2 days old his mother left at 6 weeks and never came back. I love him he is a very sweet and kindest little man and the love of my life. I just won custody back from CPS in December for my daughter on her other 2 children who are 1 & 2. It cost me dearly both financially and emotionally but I stepped up and went to bat for my daughter I believed in her. Hubby (whom is not her real father) and I moved to a different county (attorney advice) and provided a home for all of us so she could get a job and back on her feet. We paid for all of the costs including the lawyer bought her a car a cell phone got her a job etc etc. We got them back about a month ago and she went to visit friends last weekend and has been missing ever since. She never showed up for the job we got her with hubbies company and she decided to let those poor babies sleep at whatever friend would take her. When I finally tracked her down today she said she was applying for assitant not coming back was going to move out and get her own apt. She thought I was unhappy with her living with us ( I made her pick up after her and babies and keep her portin of the house straight ) as well as every other excuse she could think for not working and to move back to the county who took her children in the 1st place(Against the attorneys adive). Those poor babies have no stability no home and no chance and she has no money. I feel responsible for there demise as it is my fault. I fought for them it is my fault they are now homeless again and it is my fault there are where they are today. I think I am helping then this happens now I want the state those babies and find them a decent parent with enough good sense to provide a home and the love they need to grow and find there path in life. I can not tell you how I feel and what a horribly thing I have done in getting them returned to there mother (She has a known drug problem but I believed her to be clean) . I am beyond upset and beside myself with grief. I am not upset about her moving I am upset her choices have continued to be bad ones for the babies. That they are unstable and homeless and I don't want to lose faith but my soul hurts so bad for what has happend I simply don't know what to do . Please pray for those babies and my soul for what I have done. When you think you are dong the right thing and you are so wrong how can you look your self in the mirror knowing those babies are homeless somewhere and to know you really can't help them. Heartbroken in Seattle |
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