Quote From: amber123You really do need to walk a mile in someones shoes to make a statement like that. I was the mistress to a wonder unhappy man. I was abused in my 12 year marrige and besides work and my children & family I stayed home. He was a friend first and gained my trust and my love for 4 years. It was something that I needed at that time in my life. He came to me - I did not go after him. When you believe in someone you do some very strange things. I am a great mother, a good daughter, sister, friend and employee of the same comany for almost 25 years. I support my children alone in every aspect of their lives. Do not judge all women or men that fall into the trap of loving someone they should not. I am sad that my friends marriage was bad and encouraged him for many years to get help but there is only so much one can do. I am most sorry for his wife that she would even consider staying in the marriage with 3 older daughters and setting such an example. Why would anyone want to be with someone that does not want to be with them and them alone. I believe that marriage is build on trust, respect and honesty none of which this couple have. Maybe he is better with his lover, I am sure she (the wife) is better off without him. Something had to be missing from his marriage in the first place to look elsewhere for fulfillment. Maybe they connect in a way his wife and him no longer can.
you're so very confused I don't know where to start, but I will try!
1st you're a good sister, daughter, friend and employee? Well I don't know about your work situation & I hope this infidelity didn't take place on the job because if it did then you can scratch that off the list too. As far as the other women in your life well no you're a horrible example not because of a mistake you'd made but because you refuse to see it as a mistake, make excuses for it & then throw the blame on the wife! Shame on you.
I know you said you wre abused & that could (& for me would) excuse your mistake but not your cavalier attitude!
2nd you'd said that you believe a marriage is built on trust, respect and honesty" but the man you had an affair with was NONE of those things. How can the reasoning for him having an affair be that "something had to be missing from his marriage" for him to go looking when it's HIM that is not trust worthy, respectful and HONEST?!
Last but not least while you were clearly miserable in your abusive marriage & misery loves company how in the hell can you judge his wife for staying in a marriage with 3 grown children ? & you calling her a bad example is a bit like the pot calling the kettle black since you're an example of a cheat?
I'm curious to know what lie you'd been told to make you think that this man was "stuck" in this marriage. A person does not need permission to leave a spouse & the man who you'd had your affair with could have and should have left his wife prior to being with you.
You asked "Why would anyone want to be with someone that does not want to be with them and them alone?" One could ask you the very same thing no? I mean this man who you cheated with was with you & then would go home right? He had 3 grown daughters & wouldn't have to even pay child support right? What was his reasoning? He could have left at any time but he made a CHOICE to stay married & is it because you needed a man so badly that you believe he was lying to her but not you? LOL I'm very sad for YOU and those women like you who will justify the ugliness of being a lying deceitful cheat all because you've such low self esteem & are so unhappy that you've got to drag others down with you & make them cry too! How sad...........
