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Replies to 'Betrayal'

 
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August 23, 2005, 7:25 pm PDT

we have a very similar story

Quote From: bellacoo

Dear Parisiene  

   

Thank you for your advice.. i really appreciate it.  

   

I will speak to my "friend" and tell her how i feel about her interfering in my relationship with my boyfriend. However the problem is that he will not open up to me at all anymore.  

   

When asked why he is angry at me his response is "Nothing". I've told him if he doesn't talk to me i am not going to put up with him going to speak to someone else when the relationship concerns me and him only not our friend.  

   

I asked him if he thinks our relationship is worth saving and he simply said "its up to you".  

He believes that i am just jealous of their friendship and the truth is i am because he talks to her n not to me and during our break he had feelings for her.  

   

I told him that if he asked her if she had feelings for him and she said no not to come back to me because i WOULD NOT be second best.  

   

After we got back together i found out that is exactly what he had done and asked him why he didn't tell me before we got back together so i could make the decision myself and he didn't respond at all to that.  

   

I love him and ask him if he loves me. he tells me yes.  

   

i ask him as i need to feel loved because i don't feel that from my family and i just like the reassurance do u think that this is what is causing the problems between us??  

   

i love him and want to be with him but fear that our relationship is already over due to our friends interference.  

   

i am willing to give our friendship a break so i can work out my problems with my boyfriend but the problem is that we have same group of friends and will see each other at parties. i know that my boyfriend isn't willing to give up his friendship for our relationship.  

   

Is this a sign that he doesn't want to be with me and put our relationship first??   

I must say that I a have to agree with Parissiene 100 %.  The EXACT same thing happen to me 3 years ago.  He wants his cake and icecream, and you are left in the lurch thinking it is all your fault.  And it is not, he is not being honest with you at all.  You do deserve way better.  I still hurt from this ordeal because I loved this guy so much, I made the mistake of turning myself into a pretzel for him.  I don't know if I will ever completely trust another man, but as they say, time heals all, the hurt isn't as intenese, it's the trust that is slow to come.  I litterally agrued with this guy for 2 years, because I knew there was something that just wasn't right about his friendship with his female friend, but he would always just blame me for being jealous.  It had nothing to do with jealousy at all, it's called women's instinct.  Don't wait to long to move on. Hope this helps. 

  

Goldielox 

 


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