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August 19, 2005, 8:11 am PDT
Hi
Quote From: babsp99Maybe some of you can help me with this problem: my 5-year old granddaughter hates kindergarten! She's been going every day since August 10 and I was hoping this was a problem that would eventually go away but instead it keeps getting worse every day. She cries and clings and makes her mother (my daughter) feel very guilty. She attended pre-school for three years without all this, but it's a new school, new kids, new routine. We've tried de-emphasizing the negativity by emphasizing the positive aspects but still the behavior continues. I feel sorry for her and don't want to be cold-hearted so what's the answer? The teacher and principal have told us to tough it out and it will get better in a few days. Yesterday I had lunch with her at school and she asked if I could take her home so I think I made it worse instead of better. We went through all the crying and clinging again when I thought my visit would bring her comfort. We've tried putting her favorite stuffed kitty in her back pack for comfort but this doesn't seem to have helped. Some of her comments are "I would like to bulldoze the school," "My teacher is annoying and I don't like her," and "I hate PE most of all. It is stupid and boring. They make us dribble-I hate to dribble!" Should I just be patient and give it more time? I'm the one who picks her up in the afternoon so of course then she's happy but no so in the mornings. P.S. She's in good health and can already read and gets enough sleep and eats well. My son went to a pre-school last year and he did the same thing. What broke him of that crying and clinginess was his teacher had to hold him in her arms while he cried, as I left him there. He did this for 2 days and with the help of his teacher hanging onto him so I could leave, it eventually made him realize that the crying and clinginess isnt going to work and he had to stay at school. I know it breaks your heart to see her go through this, but if the teacher can help by holding her as you walk away, it will get better and she will adjust to it. My son is in kindergarten this year and every mourning he tells me he dont want to go to school. He hates it too. But I get him up and dressed and fed, and drop him off at school and they walk him in. He knows he has too, even though he dont want too. Give it some time and it will get better. When you drop her off, stay in a spirited mood even though she isnt in one, and tell her you will see her this afternoon. It does make us feel guilty leaving them somewhere they dont want to be, but it is what is best for them even though they dont realize it yet. My son gives me mean looks as I drop him off like, "I cant believe you are making me go here". But in the afternoons when I pick him up , he is glad to show me what all he did that day at school. Good luck!! and hang in there!
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