Replies to '08/01 Extreme Highs and Lows'

Hi there maxxy 96! 

After years of battling depression and anxiety (meds would work, then "stop"), my husband was finally diagnosed with bipolar disorder II back in December .  Since then, i have been reading everything and anything I can get my "eyes" on to learn about this disease so  I can do my best to get us both through it. This is a HORRIBLE disease that negatively impacts every aspect of the patient's life - especially the relationships with family and friends!  The most important thing you can do is learn as much about this illness as possible - for yourself as much as for your daughter.  And, learn about it from sources other than your daughter.  If she is in the middle of either a manic or depressive episode, or both, her thoughts will most likely be irrational and distorted and you will be more confused than ever.  Here's a list of some of the best sites I have found that offer info and support specifically to family members of bipolar patients...i have forwarded them to my own family and in-laws! (sorry if you already have all this!): 

•  One is www.nami.org - national alliance for the mentally ill.  They offer free classes in every state for both bipolar patients and their family.  they also have support groups you can join both in your area as well as online like this one.
• Another good one is www.dbsalliance.org - depression and bipolar support alliance.  Similar groups and support as nami
• The third one I like is www.healthyplace.com.  This site contains information for several mental illnesses, and if you follow the bipolar links and click support, there are 15-20 articles compiled discussing how to support a loved one.  They are really helpful!  like what to say or not to say to someone with bipolar, how to care for you while trying to help your daughter, that anger, denial, confusion, etc are all normal reactions to this terrible disease, etc.

From any of these sites, there are links to several other sites - hours and hours of reading.  Because everyone's symptoms are different, you will ultimately have to decide if your daughter is using her illness to take advantage of you.  And you definitely have to set boundries with her; nobody has to take abuse.  But there may be something you are saying or doing (unintentionally!!!) that makes her lash out at you.  

I hope this helped and wish you the very best!!