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Replies to 'Bipolar Disorder'
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March 7, 2006, 4:26 pm PST
 Quote From: k1946spro I am nearly at my wits end. My daughter is now in a broken down van in the front of a steakhouse with four cats, homeless, without a job, without money, trying to live in the van in the middle of winter on a very busy street in the middle of a huge city. She has not been able to keep a job for more than a month for the past two years. She's been evicted 4 times in as many months. Finally when she got her tax money back, she spent every penny on a old van with the intention of taking her cats and just start driving and get a job where ever she ends up. She did not get five miles down the road till her van broke down and now there she is. Everyone in the family is fed up with trying to help her so now she has no one to turn to, which might be a good thing. She just expects someone to come along and rescue her, but there's no one. The thoughts of her in that van with no food and freezing is almost more than I can take. My husband has forbidden me to help her anymore. He says she needs to hit rock bottom because she's the only one that can help herself. The only problem is, she doesn't think she has a problem, she thinks everyone else does. She is so embarrassing to be around because she will just up and cuss someone out in a minute for nothing. Yet at the same time she can be sweet and caring of animals and old people, as long as it's not me. Bottom line, does anyone have any ideas where I could get her some help.
Thanks. i am bipolar and very worried about your daughter. i know exactly what shes going through as i am the same way with animals and elderly. animals and elderly usually need others. maybe thats why she feels that way about them. i know its why i do. you can go to www.nami.org . its loaded with information that will (i hope) be useful. you didnt say how old your daughter is....im 32 and just in the last year realized that i have a problem. im not going to suggest you have her committed simply because i wouldnt want that to happen to me. but a lot of people get the help they so desperately need once theyve been hospitalized. they will monitor her 24/7 so she will get the meds she needs and the therapy as well. if you have a family doctor, i would ask him how you should go about handling the situation. if you believe she will harm herself, you can always call 9 11 and report that. they will then hospitalize her. i hope it doesnt come to that. good luck with your daughter and i would love to know how things are going with her. also...once shes diagnosed..she can get on social security disability and medicaid...there are also services that will help her locate a place to live. God Bless you and your family. |
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March 7, 2006, 8:54 pm PST
Quote From: k1946spro I am nearly at my wits end. My daughter is now in a broken down van in the front of a steakhouse with four cats, homeless, without a job, without money, trying to live in the van in the middle of winter on a very busy street in the middle of a huge city. She has not been able to keep a job for more than a month for the past two years. She's been evicted 4 times in as many months. Finally when she got her tax money back, she spent every penny on a old van with the intention of taking her cats and just start driving and get a job where ever she ends up. She did not get five miles down the road till her van broke down and now there she is. Everyone in the family is fed up with trying to help her so now she has no one to turn to, which might be a good thing. She just expects someone to come along and rescue her, but there's no one. The thoughts of her in that van with no food and freezing is almost more than I can take. My husband has forbidden me to help her anymore. He says she needs to hit rock bottom because she's the only one that can help herself. The only problem is, she doesn't think she has a problem, she thinks everyone else does. She is so embarrassing to be around because she will just up and cuss someone out in a minute for nothing. Yet at the same time she can be sweet and caring of animals and old people, as long as it's not me. Bottom line, does anyone have any ideas where I could get her some help.
Thanks. There are different ways of evaluating what to do for a family member who is in trouble with mental illness. The "rock bottom" theory that may be true for substance addiction is not necessarily the best theory for people suffering with mental illness because THEIR rock bottom may either be suicide or loss of life at the hands of others because they are so vulnerable. Mental illess is characterized by denial, you can't expect your daughter to rationally identify her own condition. I suggest trying to get an agency involved to provide housing or emergency food or medical care, and through that process you might be able to alert social service folks that there is a suspected mental health issue. Even a doctor could identify it from her history. People who are not able to hold down jobs are revealing their issues just from their histories. I also suggest you contact the National Alliance for the Mentally Ill (NAMI) because they provide education for families in their Family to Family program. I am also the parent of an adult child who has been in the same circumstances over and over. As of today he is 35 years old, surviving from one crisis to the next, and as his parent I have to learn to take care of my own emotions to ever be able to be of assistance to him. And I do believe with all my heart that the day will come when he will get help even though I can't imagine where it will come from. For those people who can still maintain somehow, using their wits, there is less care available because they don't end up in jail or the mental ward. If he were worse, there might be intervention. Best wishes to you, talk it over with your husband, please don't let her be at the mercy of predators. She needs housing. A little bit of help is not necessarily undermining. |
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