Replies to '02/21 More Wifestyles'

I thought a while about how to answer your question. I don't want to ramble on and on, but at the same time I don't mind telling you a little bit about what's going on. I write in status updates to Dr. Phil and it helps me get a clearer picture of where I am at. So, this will be a little like one of those updates. I also have been through Self Matters and am working through the initial chapters of his other book that was recommended to me, Relationship Rescue. If anyone out there has ever really read either of these books, you can attest to the idea that some part time jobs require less work. These books have you take a concept or feeling, examine from eight different perspectives, and then write down what you think you have learned about that subject. I have become very good at using writing as a tool to rake through my thoughts and feelings. 

Are we making progress and getting closer to our happy place? I certainly think so. Let me compare the "Grant and Kelly Project" to another one.  

We are trying to landscape part of our yard - a project that will take a lot of hard work and a lot of time. The yard is attractive as it sits now, and we could probably get by with just leaving it as it is. During the course of our project the yards appearance will get worse, but hopefully that will be brief and worth it when the project is completed. The irrigation line has a leak, so we aren't using the automated watering system and the lawn has dried up. The decorative rock is too thin in places and scattered outside of where it should be placed in numerous others (mostly due to our kids building rock yards in the lawn when it was green). There are some weeds growing in different places around the yard that will need to go. I think we would also like to add things to our yard that will make it more pleasurable for us. There are some decorative items that we brought up from Mexico that we brought into our house that add a little zest to the interior, and I think we'll look at doing more of that in the backyard. I think a large hot tub under our gazebo will the the final icing on the cake!  

I think the stage we are at right now, in our relationship project, might be similar to pulling weeds, digging ditches, and hauling out the trash. By choosing not let things be the way they had been for so long, we are having the drudge up stuff that isn't really nice to look at or think about. I You will have to ask Kelly a direct question if you want her thoughts on all of this. She's probably doing well, I see things running a little smoother for her recently. I feel like I am dealing with feelings of guilt and resentment that I didn't allow to exist until recently. You can imagine how much fun that must be to work with. I want to add that Kelly is a good sport about all of this. Every once in a while the referee sends us to our corners, and then we cool off and play nice again. 

I hope my response to your question wasn't so whacked that you give up and throw your hands in the air. Thanks for asking.