Quote From: michellenzI think that your family & you will come through this. I know that it is hard letting the man that you love more than anything in the world go. It would have been one of the hardest things in your life to have to do.
I am so pleased that you are slowly putting your life back together, as well as your children's.
I know that starting out on your own would have been hard as well.
You are doing all the right things, especially for your children. Even if they don't show it, having a bit of a normal life, even if it is a strange new life without their father in their home, is going to help them in a BIG way.
As for your husband, all I can say is keep the doors open for him. Carry on being your true self, a woman that is loving & kind. He will slowly see the woman that he did leave behind & want her back.
Don't allow anyone to bad mouth him around the kids or you, as it is not healthy for them, and if you should both get back together, having that kind of stuff will just "add to it".
Try new things, this is a hard time yes, but you can make the most of it, like it is a time of finding yourself again. Maybe start a new hobbie, or meet new friends. This way you will have things to take you mind off the current problems, and inside it helps heal the hurt as well.
You are a beautiful woman that should have the best in life. It is OK to treat yourself.
By doing all these things, by your actions, you are teaching your children how to handle all your feelings in a healthy manner. It also shows them that you are a strong woman.
Take one day as it comes, if you can get out of bed with even a weak smile on your face, then in my book...you have passed that day with flying colours.
God Bless,
Michelle,
In New Zealand.
Thank you for your encouragement and kind words. I am leaving the door open to a possible reconciliation with my husband but am not counting on it. I am moving on and am a happier, more confident person these days. I have made it clear to everyone that I will not permit them to bad-mouth my husband, esp. in front of the children. It is his right to be happy and although I have been hurt beyond words, I try not to judge him too harshly if he's really been that unhappy sharing his life with me...
I'm disappointed lately in how he's chosen to parent our kids (13 & 19), but he is the one who will suffer in the long run. He has taken to single life like a duck to water, but I remain steadfast in my decision to give him his space. Yes, I am a strong woman and with the support of my close friends and family, discovered I can tackle anything life throws my way. Some days are difficult and I get angry for the situation he's put me in, but then other days I see his view clearer. Do I have any right to deprive him of his happiness? No. But then, does he have any right to make everyone around him unhappy too? Who knows!
