Replies to 'How Childhood Abuse Still Affects Me'

 
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April 19, 2006, 2:38 pm PDT

your not alone

Quote From: karenh2

Dear catskat3, 

  

You are not hopeless and crazy.  But those are definitely familiar words running through the mind of a survivor.  You have been married 26 years (me - 20).  That has been a big accomplishment!  It could be worse.  Tell you what - we'll think of each other whenever we go to the "helpless & crazy" conversation in our heads and know we're not alone.  No we are not hopeless and crazy.  Baby steps and centering prayer.  Someone mentioned meditation.  I'm about to start meditating again so that i can stop being sick. 

  

Let's support each other and keep focus on how well we've survived; the triggers for the "hopeless & crazy" self-talk.  Some days will feel that way - just let it be, acknowledge it and be happy to be alive in the moment at least.  i will if you will! 

  

Many blessings, 

  

Karen 

hey girl, we have alot in common i was sexualy abused growing up by dad, brother and grandfather, i was raped by a neighbor at 7 then raped by a boyfreind at 20 and attempted rape in high school, i am morbidly obese now, i tiped the scales at almost 500 pounds i had gastric bypass surgery and now weigh 300 pounds which is still pretty big, i cant control it, and i know what you mean about getting sick when you lose weight i feel the same way, i hate to see my body in the mirror it is gross i do not want to look like the girls that are in the porn movies and when i am thin i feel like i look to much like them and it scares me and it makes me vulnerable to more abuse, i am very scared, my husband had an affair because he was not happy with me but since i have lost some weight he likes me agin but he has said if i ever gain the weight back he will leave me well i am terrified of gaining the weight back and i feel certain i will because i cannot get my eating under control, i just want a normal life...i just wanted youto know that you werent alone and i hope you take good care of yourself...see ya ...rachel
 


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