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Replies to 'Depression'
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August 24, 2005, 11:04 am PDT
 Quote From: djmatt I hope that maybe I have touched someone during my brief stay at this message board. However I have determined that I most move on. I really don't feel that I have much to offer here. I have received prayers and support from many of you, which I do appreciate very much. I keep getting deeper in debt, deeper in depression, and more frustrated everyday. I guess I am giving up my cause here at this time. My objective was to get some answers and to try to help others. But after careful consideration I have determined that I just don't belong here.
I am fighting a losing battle in my life. I am sinking fast financially, since I have been out of work for several months due to my depression and the neck injury. I have gotten involved in business ventures that I cannot follow thru on because of my conditions.
I am afraid of losing our home and land, and there is still no vehicle for me to drive. I am tired of the struggle and the fights, which seem to drain me even more. I am totally overwhelmed by all of this and have made some bad decisions. I have tried very hard, but have been almost totally incapacitated for the past few months.
I have sought help from numerous resources to no avail. I am still struggling with the daily bought with depression and there is only so much one can take. I would not be in these other situations had it not been for my illnesses.
This is all totally irrelevant. I am weak and wary, tired and frustrated. I haven't the energy to fight. I have fought hard over the years and kept my chin up for a long time, thru thick and thin. I am not fishing for sympathy, just explaining.
This marks yet another turning point in my life. I haven't the patience or energy to continue working on my books. I haven't the energy to go back to work to the same hell hole. I'm tired of crying, tired of losing. Eventually, enough is enough. I don't know where to go from here. I don;t know what I will do. I don't have a plan anymore. I'm just burned out, and defeated.
GOD BLESS.
I can see that you feel as though you are at the end of your rope. Let me just begin by saying that when you are where you are that to me usually signifies that something good will happen soon. It is when I have been at my darkest that a true light of hope has come to me. You seem to be in a similar place to where I was this time last November, and that worries me.
Sometimes it seems like the battle is winless but it isn't always. My love of God is what I find helps me to turn to someone who will not judge and will be there to listen. I am not unrealistic about that either I don't expect a giant hand to come down and tuck you in, but I do expect more love to enter into your heart but for you not for others. It is so commendable that you wanted to help others because that is how we gain and lift ourselves up. Givers Gain.
Have you really exhausted every avenue or have you stopped looking. There is a problem to solve here Dj and because of that I am asking you to reduce this problem down to it's most common denominator. Forget about politics forget about opinions, just focus on you, and what you need to bring yourself out of this place. Really read this slowly and think for me would you please?
I am thinking as long as you can type you are not defeated. I think as long as you can reach out for help you are not defeated. I am sorry that I was not here for you before but I would be happy to try and be for you now, if I can. Let me help you find out where to go next.
Would that be okay? Hugs and Blessings and Mar. |
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August 24, 2005, 11:41 am PDT
Quote From: djmatt I hope that maybe I have touched someone during my brief stay at this message board. However I have determined that I most move on. I really don't feel that I have much to offer here. I have received prayers and support from many of you, which I do appreciate very much. I keep getting deeper in debt, deeper in depression, and more frustrated everyday. I guess I am giving up my cause here at this time. My objective was to get some answers and to try to help others. But after careful consideration I have determined that I just don't belong here.
I am fighting a losing battle in my life. I am sinking fast financially, since I have been out of work for several months due to my depression and the neck injury. I have gotten involved in business ventures that I cannot follow thru on because of my conditions.
I am afraid of losing our home and land, and there is still no vehicle for me to drive. I am tired of the struggle and the fights, which seem to drain me even more. I am totally overwhelmed by all of this and have made some bad decisions. I have tried very hard, but have been almost totally incapacitated for the past few months.
I have sought help from numerous resources to no avail. I am still struggling with the daily bought with depression and there is only so much one can take. I would not be in these other situations had it not been for my illnesses.
This is all totally irrelevant. I am weak and wary, tired and frustrated. I haven't the energy to fight. I have fought hard over the years and kept my chin up for a long time, thru thick and thin. I am not fishing for sympathy, just explaining.
This marks yet another turning point in my life. I haven't the patience or energy to continue working on my books. I haven't the energy to go back to work to the same hell hole. I'm tired of crying, tired of losing. Eventually, enough is enough. I don't know where to go from here. I don;t know what I will do. I don't have a plan anymore. I'm just burned out, and defeated.
GOD BLESS. I hate to come on here to respond to you after I've had to admit being less than good to myself the last few days, but I read your post and I just have to respond! Don't give up and don't go away! There is no way you can conquer all that is bringing you down in one day, one week...one year!!! You are overwhelmed and the only answer that seems clear to you right now is to isolate and give up. Well....DON'T!! If you do, you are taking the one step towards self destruction that you will certainly regret later on. So you don't have a plan right now....you don't know what to do quite yet...but you are NOT ALONE! Try taking small steps...even if that first step is to continue to post your feelings, it is better than isolating and trying to face them alone. We don't have the answers you might need right now, but perhaps we can give you the support you need that will help you muster the energy to face your issues a little at a time. We are here, we are willing and most importantly, we understand! Debbie |
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August 26, 2005, 7:37 am PDT
Quote From: djmatt I hope that maybe I have touched someone during my brief stay at this message board. However I have determined that I most move on. I really don't feel that I have much to offer here. I have received prayers and support from many of you, which I do appreciate very much. I keep getting deeper in debt, deeper in depression, and more frustrated everyday. I guess I am giving up my cause here at this time. My objective was to get some answers and to try to help others. But after careful consideration I have determined that I just don't belong here.
I am fighting a losing battle in my life. I am sinking fast financially, since I have been out of work for several months due to my depression and the neck injury. I have gotten involved in business ventures that I cannot follow thru on because of my conditions.
I am afraid of losing our home and land, and there is still no vehicle for me to drive. I am tired of the struggle and the fights, which seem to drain me even more. I am totally overwhelmed by all of this and have made some bad decisions. I have tried very hard, but have been almost totally incapacitated for the past few months.
I have sought help from numerous resources to no avail. I am still struggling with the daily bought with depression and there is only so much one can take. I would not be in these other situations had it not been for my illnesses.
This is all totally irrelevant. I am weak and wary, tired and frustrated. I haven't the energy to fight. I have fought hard over the years and kept my chin up for a long time, thru thick and thin. I am not fishing for sympathy, just explaining.
This marks yet another turning point in my life. I haven't the patience or energy to continue working on my books. I haven't the energy to go back to work to the same hell hole. I'm tired of crying, tired of losing. Eventually, enough is enough. I don't know where to go from here. I don;t know what I will do. I don't have a plan anymore. I'm just burned out, and defeated.
GOD BLESS.
What you said in last paragraph is how a lot of us feel. We just have to figure out a new plan. You know suicide isn't an option because that teaches those you love that that is a coping skill and it is not it is a I "feel" like I cannot cope skill. It is the bottom of the barrel of Depression. Mar said a good thing that if you are down the only way left is up. If you cannot do it alone get help. Everybody here is saying I cannot do it alone. This post is because I know someone that since spending sprees can occur with depression is getting a letter from doctor to send to creditors because there is a law that allows them to write off since caused by emotional illness. Perhaps, you could get a letter from your counselor to send out to creditors. Spending sprees don't just happen with bipolar but with depression in general and likely why one-third of Americans are in significant credit card debt. Even our government is as it is the American way to spend our way into the poor house... I think this may disprove that misery loves company but I wanted you to know that you ARE NOT alone as our government in United States has an ever increasing deficit and one-third of Americans are in debt so don't be too hard on yourself. As Winston Churchill said, "Never, never, never give up." Why? Why not? United Way Helpline 1-800-233-HELP 4357 I hope you see a positive plan today that fits you just right...for SELF MATTERS includes djmatt |
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