Replies to 'The Other Woman'

Thanks for your reply to this issue. I do love this man or I never would have married him. I do wish however that I would have waited longer to give him time to really get over her. At the present time my husband is working out of state and get to come home just every couple of weeks so this gives me plenty of time to think about things. He was in this weekend and left late this afternoon and I could not wait to see if someone replies to my message. I am jealous, I wish that I wasn't, I have told him how I feel and he tells me that I don't have anything to worry about that he hates her. He tell me that he loves me more than anything, he said that he wishes that he had met me 35 years ago that his life would have been so much better, he tell me that I make him feel alive and worth something, he said that he had never been made to feel special with her, etc. So can you see how I am torn here? I want to believe him because I love him and I firmly believe that when you marry someone you need to do everything in your power to make it work and I did in my 31 years marriage but that marriage was something that should have never been to start with but I stayed for my sons. Wrong thing to do, period. Now this marriage, I do want it to work and I know that I have to get over this jealous that I have over his ex.  Just last night two of his kids came over to visit and his son just kept coming up with things about her that made me uncomfortable. So after they left my husband would comment on the things his son told us. Like "can you believe that she has changed jobs again, this makes the 5th job since the divorce" - "I hate the way that she is doing these kids, hurting them by continuing to lie to them about what she did to us all when she was screwing that other man then getting the divorce, I just hate her" the he tell me this "I don't care what she does, I really don't because I hate her guts and I would be fine if I never seen her again". 

Then this morning we was talking about movies we likes and didn't like and he got quite for a few minutes then he said "she never did like these kind of movies, I would always buy these and when I asked her to watch them with us she would just say that they were dumb, stupid movies, if she did watch for a little while she would just make fun of them, - I am so glad that you like these movies, we are so much alike" (the movies he was talking about were like "Ghost" You Got Mail" "Message in a Bottle") love story type. 

He is gone now and here I am writing this message. I do want to believe that he is over her but I know that he isn't because I can tell in the way he talks about her when we talk. I just don't know what I can say or do to feel better about this situation. 

Thank you and ritehere for your comments. It helps to get some advice from someone about this.