Replies to '07/19 Mind Your Business'

The majority of the messages on here were regarding the mothers but I really need to make a comment about Christie and Shannon's situation. My boyfriend and I have struggled for a year and half now with a similar situation. When he and I started dating I was unsure how serious it would be and in my mind even though he said he wanted me exclusively I believed it takes time to establish a relationship and for both people to be on the same page of what they are expecting and hoping for from that relationship if there is a relationship at all. I continued to talk to some of the men I had dated for approximately 3 months which caused much distress and arguments for my boyfriend and I . I simply was not sure in my mind I wanted to invest in a serious relationship with a guarantee we had the same expectations. I was wrong, I admitted it to him numerous times. He wanted something exclusive and serious from day 1 and I simply was not as sure I wanted that. I was honest and did not hide things from him. Does that mean therefore that now for the next 13 months I have to be on constantly defending myself with his innuendos and accusations I will cheat? He has had many relationships where the women cheated on him. Well, guess what....both of my ex-husbands cheated on me too and a few boyfriends but the difference between he and I is that I do not make any sense of it is I do not see the need to punish him for the cheaters in my past. He does! He says that they all told him the things I do and they ended up cheating so I why won't I do it too? If that fair ? No, I could go on and on badgering him for the hurt I dealt with when my past relationships cheated. That to me would mean I had the issues and trust was virtually impossible for me to accept. I reassure him, tell him I love him, tell him I will do nothing to compromise us nor let myself get in a situation that would be detrimental to us yet he continues from time to time to make the innuendos and basically in so many words, lets me know he does not trust me or believe me. I have told him that will ruin our relationship cause I cannot continue to reassure him when I have not done anything to deserve this constant blatant distrust he has in me. I love him and see so much potential. It frustrates me and makes me feel attacked for other's behaviors. This needs to stop or we cannot continue to be.  

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I agree with what you said about Dr. Phil not addressing the fact that maybe Shannon has given Christie a reason not trust him.  I was sitting there watching and waiting for Dr. Phil to start in on Shannon for the emotional affair and explain in detail more about it and perhaps he should, like you said reassure her that he is faithful, but it never came.  Sometimes I am disappointed in these types of shows that have more than 1 or 2 couples or people on because it seems like everything is rushed to fit the time slot.  But that's just my opinion.