Replies to 'Birth Stories'

kdugger

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May 14, 2006, 11:02 pm PDT

Birth Stories

Quote From: vlinderby

I can feel every ounce of your pain. As well I could tell you some stories about my ex and the things I went through during the pregnancy with my daughter. I actually had emergency outpatient surgery at 8 mos and felt every cut on my body....my ex was nowhere to be found. I also know you dont share those things to appear as though you are bashing him. I for the life of me will never understand a man like that either. As though the adultery wasnt enough they have to pour salt into our wounds as well. At least you are in the church and getting counseled. If I may ask, how old is your ex? He sounds like he has a lot of growing up to do.....unfortunately the grass is never greener on the other side....he has just stepped into a field of poisonous weeds. I feel for any woman that will have a man who leaves a pregnant wife behind and run from responsibilities. She apparently has no respect for herself. So if he is moving to San Diego is California where you reside as well? I too live about 7 hours from S.D........anyway, keep praying and I will keep you in my prayers too. If you dont get what you want though just remember one thing.....you are strong and you will survive this....just hug your children. That is what helped me get through my difficult time....take care.

My husband is 27 years old. He does have a lot of growing up to do, as do I only being 26, but from the day i got married I have had to grow up fast to fill in the areas he lacked in. He is also a correctional officer. When I used to think of a man in uniform, I used to see men who were trust worthy and dependable. Now that I am going through this I have heard so many stories of what the power they hold does to their heads. Not all of them. I do not want anyone getting offended thinking I am stereotyping men in law enforcement, because there are some good men out there in it for all the right reasons. However, law enforcement, in California, holds the highest divorce and infidelity rate of any other career. When my husband went into the academy they sent me a letter to make me aware of these statistics. But being young and in love and knowing my husband was a christian I disregarded the letter thinking it would never happen to me. I know all these things play a part into his behavior, including the baggage he brought from his past. I live in central Cali. Yeah for the valley!! ( I am being sarcastic of course.) But I wouldn't trade the small town, for raising my children in, for anything but another small town. I do truly want our family back intact, but it is so fresh that I don't know if I want it for the right reasons. I do really love him and hope with all my heart that we can work it out. But do I truly want him or do I like the comfort of familiarity and want not to be rejected. This is something I am asking God to reveal to me. Not saying that I could never forgive him, just knowing that for us to work it out is going to be a lot more heart ache. But instead of trying to figure it out myself , I have given it to the Lord and pray for his timing, not mine. Because mine would be to have all the answers now, which would leave no room for growth for either one of us. I believe God uses everything for the good and he has something working here. Thanks for the encouragement. Instead of just complaining and explaining it is nice to hear from someone so close to the situation, and be able to vent a little also.

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