Replies to '09/05 The Divorce Experiment'

Hi. Just happened to be up at 4 am crying but I wa under Police marriage abuse at 22 to 32 myself AND LOST my child from the stress he gave me, etc, and CRY today about it. I am about to write to  Phil now .

I am Mentally TORTURING myself because I ALLOW him to talk to me thru E mail. I have sent him many MEAN and "blaming" e mails and he knows that . I ak him WHY do you want to keep writing me then?

Feelings, (hate whateve) are obviously therein me?

He tries to do nice things  and I comply at those times. Deep down I want tell Dr.Phil but sice my ex is undercoer I do not believe he will ever even "talk". He LIES to everyonbe.. escept me maybe?

I guess he may feel bad but he is a VERY SICK sexual individual and if I told on him, I MAY be able to take his job from him but I just want to learn to say NO in my life!!

I hate myself for being so NICE and I am FINALLY gettng it.. when I FEEL half dead.

I have a GREAT SMART mind though except I am  already 45 so feel I past my life and got NOTHING> I live week 2 wek and NEVER dreamed I would be like this. I am SO depressed and I am SCARED too!

No one knows around me that I get up and CRY like this. FOUR psychs on the first visit said "here" take a SCRIPT!! UUGGHH! NO way!!

I resent that. I am EXTREMELY good lookin but NEVER used that and do NOT know how. My esteem is too low.

God bless you and YES it probably WILL be with you "forever" but deal with it NOW. DO NOT let it hurt your heart at 45 YEARS OLD!!

I stopped  the Police after I made it into the academy.I could NOT finish! NOT for me.

Take Care and Good Luk girl! YOU WILL MAKE IT!! For your daughter! YEAH!!

Welcvome 2 chat at lauletta@bellsouth.net

Lynda