Quote From: lsgunterI am newly engaged of about 3 months and I'm 20 years old. Many of my friends are also getting engaged and getting married. I am very worried that my generation isn't taking marriage very seriously in the sense that they have no plan - they just want to "live on love." I think it's great that they have that passion and commitment, but I believe marriage is entering into sharing your entire life with a person which includes finances, jobs, and religion, among others. Many of my friends don't have any financial plan or even full-time jobs. Because so many marriages end in divorce especially over financial problems, it really scares me for them. My fiance and I have already started to map out our budget for when we get married in about 10 months, and it really makes me feel a lot more secure that we have a plan. I know this doesn't ensure that we won't encounter money problems, but I do feel like it is more preventative than doing nothing. This could be a big concern of mine because I'm in school to be a marriage and family therapist, but does anyone else share my fear for society's lack of seriousness concerning marriage?
Hey there!
First of all congrats on your engagement! I'm sure you were smiling as you read that part. Anyway, I read your Message, and can't tell you how happy I am to know someone out there feels the same. Like yourself, I'm also 20 years old, and it seems that everyone around me is getting engaged, or married, in fact, my boyfriend's sister just announced her engagement last night and I'm totally happy for them; however marriage is a big deal and does take committment and compromise. I believe when you marry someone you marry them for life, not just tell you hit a midlife crisis. I don't thnk marriage is always great, but you gotta stick it out, and not give up with a divorce.
I realize the divorce rate is getting scary high ( my sister and her husband are divorcing after 13 yrs.) so it's on my mind too. But I think you can't let that get to your head too much. What you and your fiance have is awesome, and it seems that you two are taking marriage, and all that comes with it seriously, which is a great start. Just know what the two of you have, and forget society. It seems as though you're religious so you know what I'm taking about as far as not being of this world, just in it.
I know my sister's divorce is effecting me, but I just can't allow it to effect my relationship. It seems her ex hasn't taken that whole "death do us part" vow seriously, but I do know that someday I will. Anyway, my final suggestion is that there really is no guarantee to a marriage free of divorce, but find peace in knowing that you're gonna give it all you've got for the one that you love. I hope to keep in touch with you. (there's more where that came from.)
Understandingly, Crystal
