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Replies to '03/27 More Wifestyles, Part 3'
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May 24, 2006, 11:48 am PDT
 Quote From: kschmittz First off, I am so sorry you cannot seem to get over "my opinions" based on things you have said, alluded to and referred to . I feel YOU are the one who made snap judgments (more than one even after your BAD event) before even knowing who was on the message boards. You seem to have some stereotype of WM's that we are a different breed than a SAHM. Some of us are and some of are not that different. It's great you can stay home AND financially provide solely on your husband's income. Not all families can do that. I don't think that because you stay home you are lazy or avoiding a "real" job as I do believe pareting is a "real" job. But don't you are think I'm materialistic and selfish because I work and use daycare. What if (and I just posted the same type of question to Julie, too) your husband's salary wasn't enough and you had to work just to provide what you now have? Most women who are at home are EXTREMELY grateful they can do so and try in many ways to show that to their husbands. Amy has this same line of thinking only to an extreme- in my opinion. I do believe, however, there are realistic goals when you are at home whether you have one or ten children. I just hear a lot of excuses from SAHM's regarding the house, dinner, what hubby doesn't do blah blah blah. I think some men are unrealistic but I think some women take staying home for granted. NOT YOU but some I have seen. Please give me an example of what I said that offends you SO GREATLY since my "bad event" (some people would just think of it as a bad day and move on, I'm sure you've had bad days too and I'm sure you have empathy.) I'm not "grateful" that I get to stay home. It's the plan. I'm no more grateful for this then my husband is for getting to work. It's the plan. It's what we planned. It's life. I'm no more grateful to stay home then you probably are for your nice job. It's your life...right? You are grateful that you are healthy, happy and your kids are doing well...right? If I had to get a job? Well my husband would probably get his hours changed later and I would probably take a morning type job. These are things we've discussed and even though it's really not likely, we have a plan. We also have savings for this kind of thing. Life insurance for other things. He has enough life insurance so that I can stay home with my daughter until she is 12 if need be (if)...I have enough life insurance to cover the cost of a daycare/after school care until she is 12, if need be. This is what our financially planner helped us do. Trust me, we have a few back up plans. LOL "But don't you are think I'm materialistic and selfish because I work and use daycare." I'm not sure what you meant by this. I never said you were either of those thing. I don't know you. I have no idea if you are materialistic or selfish. I have only seen you write a few messages on a message board. I'd have to know a person personally in real life for along time before I'd make a judgment like that. This is our plan, our agreement, our personal values...there isn't anything I feel more grateful for than that I have a husband who is in total agreement with me on this. And he feels the same towards me. And someone on another board said something so perfectly well, I can't remember her name but it was something like this: I didn't stay home to iron and cook. I worked until I had my baby. I stay home FOR my kid, NOT for my husband. So if he has to iron his own shirts now and then and cook dinner half the time then so be it. He doesn't mind. He wants to know that I cared for our child all day (who is splashing in the baby pool on the porch about 15 feet from me where I can see her and that is why I can type this right now...gotta defend that part.) If some other couple has a miscommunication on who does what that is THEIR problem. My husband and I are just fine and dandy the way we are. |
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