Replies to '03/27 More Wifestyles, Part 3'

Hello there everyone.  Nice to see that the debate is still going on.  First, I want to say I have not been around (as if anyone cares) because I started a new job.  Very hard to start over...but it will be good in the end.  Next, Purple, it's interesting how you can pick apart my messages line by line and make your comments.  I never asked you to beg my forgiveness..why is is so important to you?  That's funny to me.  I Your feelings about WM's are very clear.  In fact, my hubby read your message dated May 1st:  

" I do understand that there are times when it's needed, but I don't think the majority of kids in daycare need to be there. I also resent the idea that a SAHM like me, who gladly sacrifices things like a nice car, a house, a yard, nice clothes and eating out to stay at home and mother my child myself, all day everyday is the same level of mother as someone who's kids are in daycare all day long. Not saying that you hold that idea and I'm not saying that is what you were saying either. I just am putting my two cents on the table.
ss to sacrifice certain things. Like I said, we don't have many material things."  

You feel, whether you exactly say it or not, that women who use daycare really don't need to- that we are in essence living a lifestyle that we put above our kids."

False assumption. I never said anything like that.
 

and yes, you did mean what I thought..even he got that same impression.  Did you or did you not write this?  We are not the "same level" of Mom?  I have tried to be as diplomatic as possible on this subject but you know, I just don't think people get it.  I just get tired of hearing what more we my hubby and I) could sacrifice to keep our kids out of daycare.  Why is that the ultimate goal?  People say it a lot..."My kids have never stepped foot in a daycare".  Personally, I think balance should be the key for all families.  Some men work too much, some women need more interaction with adults, some kids need more attention from their parents and some families both single and dual incomes) could spend money more wisely.  I see single income families abusing the system or living "without" and wonder what effect that has on the family.  These same families seem to have newer cars than myself and plenty of new clothes.  I feel good knowing that my hubby and I have not ever taken a dime of welfare in any way, shape or form to support our family.  

 Our parents live far away so weekend overnighters are not really an option.  I feel good knowing my kids don't make 3 page Christmas lists but get excited to make cookies.  I feel good knowing I help my hubby provide financially and that he, in turn, helps around the house.  It's positive for kids to see that.  It's easy to see other situations whatever they may be and think how it's not like our own- better or worse.  First impressions are tough to overcome for anyone.    

Hello there everyone.  Nice to see that the debate is still going on.  First, I want to say I have not been around (as if anyone cares) because I started a new job.  Very hard to start over...but it will be good in the end.  Next, Purple, it's interesting how you can pick apart my messages line by line and make your comments.  I never asked you to beg my forgiveness..why is is so important to you?  That's funny to me.  I Your feelings about WM's are very clear.  In fact, my hubby read your message dated May 1st:  

" I do understand that there are times when it's needed, but I don't think the majority of kids in daycare need to be there. I also resent the idea that a SAHM like me, who gladly sacrifices things like a nice car, a house, a yard, nice clothes and eating out to stay at home and mother my child myself, all day everyday is the same level of mother as someone who's kids are in daycare all day long. Not saying that you hold that idea and I'm not saying that is what you were saying either. I just am putting my two cents on the table.
ss to sacrifice certain things. Like I said, we don't have many material things."  

You feel, whether you exactly say it or not, that women who use daycare really don't need to- that we are in essence living a lifestyle that we put above our kids."

False assumption. I never said anything like that.
 

and yes, you did mean what I thought..even he got that same impression.  Did you or did you not write this?  We are not the "same level" of Mom?  I have tried to be as diplomatic as possible on this subject but you know, I just don't think people get it.  I just get tired of hearing what more we my hubby and I) could sacrifice to keep our kids out of daycare.  Why is that the ultimate goal?  People say it a lot..."My kids have never stepped foot in a daycare".  Personally, I think balance should be the key for all families.  Some men work too much, some women need more interaction with adults, some kids need more attention from their parents and some families both single and dual incomes) could spend money more wisely.  I see single income families abusing the system or living "without" and wonder what effect that has on the family.  These same families seem to have newer cars than myself and plenty of new clothes.  I feel good knowing that my hubby and I have not ever taken a dime of welfare in any way, shape or form to support our family.  

 Our parents live far away so weekend overnighters are not really an option.  I feel good knowing my kids don't make 3 page Christmas lists but get excited to make cookies.  I feel good knowing I help my hubby provide financially and that he, in turn, helps around the house.  It's positive for kids to see that.  It's easy to see other situations whatever they may be and think how it's not like our own- better or worse.  First impressions are tough to overcome for anyone.    

Hello there everyone.  Nice to see that the debate is still going on.  First, I want to say I have not been around (as if anyone cares) because I started a new job.  Very hard to start over...but it will be good in the end.  Next, Purple, it's interesting how you can pick apart my messages line by line and make your comments.  I never asked you to beg my forgiveness..why is is so important to you?  That's funny to me.  I Your feelings about WM's are very clear.  In fact, my hubby read your message dated May 1st:  

" I do understand that there are times when it's needed, but I don't think the majority of kids in daycare need to be there. I also resent the idea that a SAHM like me, who gladly sacrifices things like a nice car, a house, a yard, nice clothes and eating out to stay at home and mother my child myself, all day everyday is the same level of mother as someone who's kids are in daycare all day long. Not saying that you hold that idea and I'm not saying that is what you were saying either. I just am putting my two cents on the table.
ss to sacrifice certain things. Like I said, we don't have many material things."  

You feel, whether you exactly say it or not, that women who use daycare really don't need to- that we are in essence living a lifestyle that we put above our kids."

False assumption. I never said anything like that.
 

and yes, you did mean what I thought..even he got that same impression.  Did you or did you not write this?  We are not the "same level" of Mom?  I have tried to be as diplomatic as possible on this subject but you know, I just don't think people get it.  I just get tired of hearing what more we my hubby and I) could sacrifice to keep our kids out of daycare.  Why is that the ultimate goal?  People say it a lot..."My kids have never stepped foot in a daycare".  Personally, I think balance should be the key for all families.  Some men work too much, some women need more interaction with adults, some kids need more attention from their parents and some families both single and dual incomes) could spend money more wisely.  I see single income families abusing the system or living "without" and wonder what effect that has on the family.  These same families seem to have newer cars than myself and plenty of new clothes.  I feel good knowing that my hubby and I have not ever taken a dime of welfare in any way, shape or form to support our family.  

 Our parents live far away so weekend overnighters are not really an option.  I feel good knowing my kids don't make 3 page Christmas lists but get excited to make cookies.  I feel good knowing I help my hubby provide financially and that he, in turn, helps around the house.  It's positive for kids to see that.  It's easy to see other situations whatever they may be and think how it's not like our own- better or worse.  First impressions are tough to overcome for anyone.