Quote From: mench60 Nancy has to take charge of her home! John can load all his stuff into one of those Pods & haul it away to his own private storage area! Nancy-- it's your home! Let him clutter up the trailer while you live in comfort in the house. He has lots of therapy to do while he figures this out, but he doesn't have to ruin your life in the process! And forcing those cats to live in moldy cat poop-- that's just WRONG!
If he pays the bills late, then YOU pay the bills on time. Tons of wives do the family bookkeeping. Don't let him bring ONE THING into your home-- he has a big trailer to use. If he wants to see you, he can make a date and take you out. That house is no longer his to clutter. Buy him a nice gift-- 100 small storage boxes. He needs the clutter right now, but it can be in another location, not in the family home! By the way, a support group for you would help you alot.
Good luck! You can do it!
Hi Mench. Thanks for replying to my message. It's nice to know someone read what I said! Your ideas and thoughts are right on! That's a great answer - Nancy and the kids need to live in the home themselves and not allow John to live there until he resolves his issues. If she stands firm with NO exceptions, that could make him think more about getting help. I don't remember if both the house and trailer are in this horrible condition, but if Nancy is going to take this stand - help will be needed to clean things up. If I were her I'd hire people to haul stuff off and clean/disinfect the home - and make John pay for it. Maybe Dr. Phil's truck-team could at least dump it off at the trailer. Then, she could call out the local health department on John's place and see what they would do! As for the pets, I hate to say it - but they should go elsewhere. This is too much to deal with in addition to all the rest. People should be able to manage their home and family pretty well before taking on a pet. If pets are only going to add to the chaos, it's not good!
My husband pays the bills on time, but I do the filing and record-keeping. I guess your point is the best one - Nancy needs to take charge, take action, and never let this happen again. Even if means living separately from John indefinately until he finally gets it!
