Quote From: smiles23Thanks to all of you who shared your stories on the message board about becoming and finding your authentic self. From the sounds of it, Dr. Phil's bookis the place to start? I am happy in my career but find that I have a very negative viewpoint and not a lot of self confidence. I look at others in awe because they seem to be handling life so well...whether they are or not, they just look and seem happier. Is Dr. Phil's book the first step in defining myself and what will make me happy?
When I first attempted to read the book in April 03, I read the first 3 chapters & did the workbook (the workbook really helps too!) - my year motto was: NO MORE GRIEVING. I spent the next months saying that to myself every morning and every night. It was my mantra.
Then I picked up Dr. Phil's show during a family death watch that summer and jumped on the Weight Loss Challenge. I found that when I read Keys 1 & 2, I became so upset. I joined a support group and had to re-read those 2 keys and I was LOSING IT! So I turned to Self Matters in February and when I put the book down a few months later, I chose one of my long term goals: sewing (39 years dream), to use to help me with my thinking. I figured that I needed to focus on something that I could develop goals and track my goals. Cause goals always bought me so much pain.
It was painful and it was hard. But once I got past the writing down my past - I realized he was right, I'd been living in that pain for so long, it was addictive. I mean, if I had really bought closure to it, the pain would have gone away and it wouldn't be nothing but a memory - not my NOW LIFE.
If your memories are painful, BREATHE! it does get better. Only took me a few months to learn to challenge my thoughts and now I'm an expert. I do it without thinking! I've been saying positive things to myself for quite a long time now!
