Quote From: suethedj4uDr. Phil says that forgiveness is what you do for yourself, not for other people. When you forgive, it doesn't mean that you approve of what's happened. Rather, it means that you're giving yourself permission to move on with your life.
There is no right timeline for recovery. For some people, making peace happens suddenly and spontaneously. For others, it takes time and effort. You may have to make a conscious effort every day to forgive. To say, "I'm letting this go. I'm not going to invest hatred, bitterness, anger, resentment in this person anymore." You can find closure in forgiveness.
You can't change the things that happened in your life, but you can decide how you interpret and respond to them. If you didn't receive support when you needed it, give it to yourself now.
Listen to your internal dialogue. What are you saying to yourself? Write them down without censoring them. Is what you're saying fair and true? If not, generate new ways of thinking. Someone may have said horrible things to you long ago, but it's possible you took over for them when it stopped.
Consider what you need to do to get emotional closure. Maybe you just need a simple apology. Find your Minimal Effective Response — the least thing you can do to resolve your pain.
Share your experience with others. Finding a lesson in what happened can help put the experience in perspective and your emotions in check. People can thrive and suffer at the same time.
Just saw what happened with Judy. I pray that things get better for you. From you I learned that life is too short to be worrying about something that happened in high school. Just think of all the energy you put into worrying about EJ? The original show revolved around your resentment for a high school girl, and very little about what really matters, family.
