Replies to 'Stay At Home Moms'

Quote From: jaimie1974

You are not worthless! You cant allow what other people think of you, or what you think that they think of you, to drag you down. Being a stay at home mother is work, really hard work, and anyone who doesnt agree doesnt know what they are talking about.
I think that sometimes, people say things without even thinking about it first. They might just assume that taking care of children and a household isnt work, but we know different. You are making personal sacrifices to be a stay at home mother. Dont allow anyone to ever make you doubt that you are a person contributing to our society!! By being a stay at home mother, you are raising children who will feel secure knowing that mom is there for them. Your children are benefiting in ways that you dont even know just yet, but that you will be able to see later on in life. Nurturing our children is the most important job in the world.
I know exactly how you are feeling, I felt that way too. When my youngest started to be in school all day, I slowly started taking classes at a nearby college. This was so helpful because it gave me a sense of accomplishment outside of the home, I felt so much better about myself. I also made new friends and acquaintances. The resentment I used to feel towards my husband, because, lucky him, he got to go to work and be around adults, has been replaced by respect. It is a newfound respect, though- I feel that I respect him more because he respects ME more. He knows that I am taking care of the children, the home, the pets, and managing to stay on the Deans list- and thats impressive- something to brag about, even.
A few years ago, at a Christmas party at my husbands job, someone asked me, so, what do you do? I said that I was a stay at home mother. The reply: oh. What I heard in that oh was, kind of like, hmm, sorry to hear that. Very frustrating, very disrespectful, and very disappointing because that is what people think of the women who are raising the future productive, respectful, responsible citizens? Now when Im asked that same question, I say, Im a full time stay at home mom, part time student. And people say, oh, what is your major? Every time, they dont say, oh, how old are your children? or ask me about my family. But I feel so different now that I have a bit of a life outside of the home, it just doesnt get me down that people think that way, because Im the one living my life and I know that raising my children and keeping an orderly home is real work. I think the key is to start to get a life of your own outside of the home. Even if it is a small, part time job that can be flexible with you because of your childrens school hours, or taking a class, just something that is for YOU. A separate identity.
You dont deserve to suffer depression any longer over this. You deserve to be happy and have a fulfilling life.