Replies to 'Working Moms'

Hey there, Holland Mum, from Scotland Mum.....  

You sound like you have things worked out pretty well... and the fact that your husband and kids help out is fantastic...  not everyone is as blessed with that help.  However, congratulations on getting back into the workplace and I hope the added hours are what you wanted.    

As for finding time for yourself...  perhaps if you sat and listed the sort of things you would like to do in your free time.... then you can start to work out how to obtain that precious time.  I find it hard at the moment to find the time - but I have made a start as I know what I would do with it if I had it!!!!  I want to do a bit of drawing, write letters to friends, go for walks (alone) and visit friends I have not visited for a good while.  I list the things I want to do and strive to tick them off my list as I do them, even if it takes me a hundred or so years to do them all.  Everytime I get one thing done, it keeps me going..... the list will never end as I keep adding things as they come up.  I suppose good time management is the key, and help from the family...... they have to understand it is important for you to have your `alone` time to get your head around life, etc!  Of course, I don`t have the magic answer that will get you loads of time alone, but maybe someone out there has a better suggestion.  I hope you find what works for you...... let us know on this message board.  I think every mum in the world would love the answer to this one!!!!  Good luck friend!!!!  

Judy :-)  

Hi Dutchkaren, 

I steal little moments for myself throughout my day.  For instance, watching Dr. Phil is my time, and I send the kids off to their rooms to play.  And I'm not just sitting there watching it either, I'm cross stitching or knitting, whatever, sometimes even reading a book.  Then after bedtime, I usually do the cleaning, then after that I'm free for at least an hour for whatever I want.  I feel lucky though, because I know many mothers who can't find time, even at night when the kids are asleep.  I also stay up late if I feel I need extra time to myself.  I can't go to bed right after the kids, because even though I'm sleeping, I feel I haven't had the quiet time I need.  Sounds funny, but if I do go to bed right after the kids, there is usually a great chance I'll be cranky in the morning.   

Another thing I have noticed from my friends, and something that was pointed out to me in a parenting class,   was that mom's always feel that the housework needs to be done on time etc.  Well it doesn't.  The dishes can wait, the folding can wait, the ironing can wait etc.  It doesn't need to be done right away.The end of the world won't appear if dishes are in the sink.  I used to clean all day long and when we discussed it in the parenting class it took a while for me to realize that they were right.  So now I don't do the laundry as soon as the dryer bell goes off, I don't do the dishes right after dinner.  They can sit there for a while.  Why should I miss time with my kids, or time to myself, or cuddle time with my husband because of a few silly chores?  My house is still clean, I just learned that it's not the most important thing I have to do.  LOL!  Hope that makes sense... 

~Ceno =)