Replies to '09/05 Phobias'

I too understand what living with emetophobia is like.  I am a 28 year old emetophobe wo has lived in fear every single solitary day for the last 22 years of my life with my anxiety at its worst for the last 2 years.  Like the rest of us, I am embarrased to share this with people unless absolutely necessary and I was thrilled to know that I am not alone.  I see myself as a "freak" and as "crazy" and I know only too well how irrational this phobia is.  I am a junior high teacher and have to be a teacher at this level because I feel that my students have enough of an understanding of their bodies to leave the room if they are sick.  I love my job, but now I even fear field trips with my students because I had a student get motion sick on a bus last year.  I identify with Carey completely because I just returned from my honeymoon to Europe for three weeks on which I thought about people being sick on the plane the whole time(of course it never happened!).  I am tired of living like this and I won't take it anymore.  I have begun to seek help and have been going to a cognitive behavioural therapist since January.  I don't notice any major changes yet because of course because it takes a long time to unravel 22 years of avoidance behaviours, but I am learning to look at the positives in a perceived "threatening" situation, to reduce the anticipation of worrying that someone will throw up that causes 97% percent of my anxiety (think about it, how many times do we worry and how many times is it actually warranted?) and to reinforce myself for the chances I do take.  For example, I did get on the plane for my honeymoon, I did survive my student getting sick on the bus and this summer, I was able to teach summer school to 6 and 7 year olds for a month (this was a very threatening situation for me), and most recently I started some exposure therapy; that is, I have been able to look at some pictures of people actually throwing up and have been able to keep my anxiety level down.  This phobia is all about the fear of not being in control for me and I'm hoping that one day soon I will be in control of my anxiety and will be able to cope.  I don't expect miracles, just a chance at a normal life.  It would be nice to think "Ew, gross!" and not "Danger!  Danger!  Danger!"  when someone gets sick. 

Hang in there all of you, I'm trying! 

M.