Replies to 'Sex'

yes, you are.  an affair is not an option for me, i wouldn't do that.  sometimes, that little child, the one that seeks her own comfort, replaces the adult part.  it just makes me angry because we have been together so long and our time together is coming to a close.  and for me as a woman, it;s hard to accept the physical part of our relationship may never return.  i'm only 50, and still like to be held and kissed.  i have tried to reconnect to him that way but he pulls back from physical touch.  i understand that as a man, he finds it humiliating. to know he can't.  my suspicion is that he won't.  something triggered this in him. i know that.  i realize he must return to therapy to seek the answers i cannot give him.  i am working on that.  but to have an affair or hurt him or my family is not something i would ever do.  trust me.  if my future brings this 32 year relationship to an end, whatever it would be, then i would accept it.  what i was trying to say is that i am not stupid.  that could be another woman.  unless he finds the reason why 'he has no desire' , our marriage will be on a precarious ledge.  intimacy is part of all marriages.  i don't want to be his roommate. i want to be more.  we have been through therapy, the therapist has told him all of this already.  he is choosing not to do it.  my choice is then to continue to live this way, to stay in this marriage for it's 'financial security', this advice from the therapist, find other ways to fill my life, 'advice from the therapist' be thankful i'm married, advice from the therapist' or get divorced.  all options i really don't like.  but realities that i am trying to accept.  in talking to many women my age and reading these boards from women my age, it is very common that 'sexual intimacy is given up.  i never thought that i would ever be in this position.  it makes me sad. i didn't see it coming, never thought that i would live in a 'sexless marriage.  thanks for your support.  your words brought me back to the reality of adult world.  i know i am responsible for my own life, not for anyone Else's.