Replies to 'Toxic Family Relationships'

Quote From: fairytale

I have a toxic son, and ex-daughter in law. Both are addicts, and have two sons. One son is 18, and is now going to college, because his other grandmother and I care enough to see that he gets there. He has worked hard, and is a wonderful child, despite his parents. The other child is 14, and is currently being shoved from pillar to post, because the buearocrats at the DHS, refuse to do their job. My daughter would like to have guardianship of him so that he can have a stable homelife, as well, as a family. We feel that since he is fourteen that he should be able to determine where he wants to live. His mother has threatened their lives, has used verbal abuse, and pyhsical abuse, but the powers that be keep taking her side. I am so angry that this is the way it is, not just where they are, but everywhere. Who says that children are "better off" with the parents. If this is so, why do so many end up either dead, or badly injured, or in foster care for the entirety of their lives. When there are family members, who would be more than willing to take them and raise them as their own.  I fail to see that the Child Protection Services, are even close to living up to their name. I am sure that they have protected some children, but, it seems that in this day and time it is really a mis nomer to call them that. Read the news from Nevada, and you will see what I mean. There have been 67 deaths since the first of the year, by so called "watched and wonderful parents" Does anyone have any suggestions on how to get this child out of this situation. We have hired an attorney to try to get the guardianship. But, the mother has custody, and seems to be able to weedle her way around everyone to do with the system where she lives. She has been picked up for drunkenness, breaking a court ordered restraining order, and other things, but has spent no time in jail for any of these offenses. My son who is a crack addict, can't hold a job for any length of time, so far has not had any run ins with the law, but has lost almost everything he owns. I don't get it. I have tried to help him so many times, but it doesn't seem to do any good. Why won't they help themselves???????