Replies to 'Black Sheep of the Family?'

You know I feel like I don't know my family anymore. We've had a rough couple of years in my family. I try to be strong, but my strength is faltering. My mother passed away in June of 2005 and before the grief had a chance to settle my sister had her children put into foster care due to drug use. All I ever had was my mom and my sister. I dont have any contact with my dad. I always felt like I had the mother role in my sisters life because my mother had gotten in car accident that forever changed her when we were very young. Now before Ive had a chance to deal with what has happened to my sister and her children another problem has come up in my life. All this has happened in the last year and a half. My uncle, who is also my godfather, has decided to disown me.

The reason is because I still speak to his ex-daughter-in-law. His son lives out of town and she called me and told me that my cousin (her ex-husband) had a baby with his new girlfriend. The reason she knew was because my cousin called her to pick up the kids because he was at the hospital waiting for his baby to be born. The whole pregnancy had been kept hush hush. My grandmother had to see that the new girlfriend pregnant before they told her. The baby was born on a Tuesday and on the following Friday I had told my aunt that the baby was born. Well then she told my grandmother. Well my uncle called my grandmother on that Sunday to tell her and well you guessed it . . . she already knew and apparently it was my fault and I had no right to tell her! Apparently they were not sure it was my cousins baby and wanted to go see the baby first before they said anything. He had my grandmother call me and say if I did not stop talking to his ex-daughter-in-law that I would lose him and his family. Well I was so hurt that first he would threaten me like that and secondly he had my grandmother do his talking for him, putting her in the middle!! I told my grandmother that wasnt a big threat since I never heard from him and he never invited us to his gatherings. He wasnt really apart of my life. The only time I really seen him and his family is on holidays. It was the fact that he even threatened me that really made me upset! Now I feel like an outsider. Ive refused to go to any family gatherings and now with the holidays coming up then its already hard because my mom is not there to share it with me, but I dont want to go because I dont want to be around someone who feels like their life is better without me. Why should I got just to feel uncomfortable, but its my family, especially my children that get the short end of the stick. I dont know what to do anymore. Im at my wits end! I open for suggestions.