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Replies to '12/22 Custody Battles Gone Bad'
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October 6, 2006, 4:33 pm PDT
 Quote From: misingtanner I to have lost my son 6 year old son to my ex. My ex was verbally and physically abusive to me and to my other son. The court system has not even heard what I had to say. I have taken this to court to revise our parenting plan but he comes out looking like a pure angle, when deep down inside he knows what he is doing is wrong. I live 650 miles away from my son that is the only way I could go on with my life but the courts decided since our son had "established relationships" with both sets of grandparents it would be best to give the father residential custody. I tried to kill myself before I moved because the fighting and the constant abuse just got to much, the protective order didn't do any good. But the court still gave him residential custody. I do not have the money to fight him. And I feel like eventually I will lose my son completely. He does not allow me to talk to our son and when I do talk to him, my ex is telling him what to say and what not to say. We have joint custody but I have no rights at all. But I still make sure I pay that child support every month.
I wish I have to admit that I do not know the pain of losing custody of my children Thank GOD because I could not live without them. And fortunately I have an ex-husband who is a wonderful father and we always put our children first. Having said that....I can't believe what I'm reading! You tried to take your life and you expected to keep custody of your children? C'mon. I don't know you and I don't know your ex and I'm certainly not a mental health expert...but I wouldn't leave my children alone for a DAY with anyone who is so unstable that they try to kill themselves. Much less make that person RESPONSIBLE for them on a daily basis. I am not judging YOU as a person because like I said, I do not know you. Nor I am not judging your "mothering" ability or the fact that you love your children. But don't you think that you would have a better chance of getting him back if you get your own problems lined out first?
Also, in my personal opinion (and you know what they say about opinions here in Texas...they're like elbows, everybody has one!) I would definately move closer to my child. If you have joint custody your ex has no choice but to let you have your visitation. And yes you DO have rights. You are still the mother. Things may not have turned out the way you wanted...but don't make your son live without his mother! Move closer and be involved in his life! I understand how hard it is financially when you have other children to think of to just pack up and move, but make a plan....make it happen. Don't just give up! Be involved! And for goodness sakes, if you're still in the emotional state of being suicidal....get counseling! I'll keep you in my prayers and good luck! |
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