Quote From: deb125I am a 33 yr old mother of one, and wife. As well as that I am dissabled. I was wondering how other people deal with the stress and demands of trying to ballance the wants and needs of your family with the physical limits you face. Some of my background? I suffered a broken back in 2001. Dr's didn't find it for a year. I went from dr to dr getting told to take more pain medication and antidepressants. One Dr even told me I was
just a woman and was panicing because I had a little pain. I could rant forever on the history but that doesn't change where I sit now. After three major spine surgeries I am very limited. It also doesn't help that to outsiders I look normal. any suggestions?
Hello Deb,
I was shocked to read that doctor's remark "you're just a woman". This is not a doctor, this is a major jerk if you ask me!!!
I can imagine that people act strangely because your disability is not visible. But really, that is their problem, not yours. If they show that little empathy to your situation, they should have a good look at themselves. I think the same counts for your family. Did you ever ask yourself the question "what do I want?" Or have you always looked at the needs that other people have? I think it is time for yourself now, girl.
Pay a bit less attention to what others might say and think. Try to find a Dr. that is not an asshole. Especially in the US you have to stand up (sorry for those words) for your own needs. Others will help you, but you have to be the initiator of things.
Think about what Dr. Phil says: you only get what you ask for in life. So if you want to have more, ask for it. don't sit on the sideline. A disability is a nasty thing, but it is not the end of the world.
I dare to say that because i'm disabled myself. I have spina bifida. I've been in a wheelchair all my life. I learned to deal with it, although I must admit that I live in a country that is a little bit more friendly to disabled people. Our social security is better, so I have a small income. But even then, there are a lot of challenges. I am 41, and just recently I got my own small stress counselling practice. Not because I got it, but because I stood up to people that said "you can't do that". I asked them: "why not?" If others can, I can. I still can't live from that practice but it's a start. Don't let others limit your possibilities.
Mikao
