Quote From: soni_gIt's sad when others state that most of the homeless are looking for handouts, that they are there through their own mistakes. How untrue this is, and how sad they are viewed that way. Perhaps it's that thinking that keeps them from getting the help. Remember, "there but by the grace of God go I"? There's a lot of truth to that. I know.
I worked hard all my life and survived two of just about every disaster you can imagine. I had saved, too; had a good little nestegg built up. I was independent, hard-working, dedicated, and determined that I would live my life on my terms, having plenty to see me into my golden years, which would be spent travelling and living a darn good life. I had it all planned with the exception of making the reservations.
But life doesn't always give us what we want. My nestegg went into living expenses and doctor bills when a rare neurological condition put me out of the job market for two years. Insurance runs out when you run out of money. One disorder caused another, and as hard as I tried, it got to a point I could not work, and I was so close to retirement. But you do what you have to. The doctor had given up on me, arthritis had set in over most of my body, and he already had me riding in a wheelchair until I was 6 feet under, which he figured would be soon. I was without income, and had nowhere to turn. I ended up in a homeless shelter, and thought my life was over.
Turns out it was just beginning. My life changed when I learned the truth. Yes, many are addicts, but many are not. There were mothers with children. Some had been abandoned, some had lost everything when they lost a job or a spouse. So many situations, and so many not of their own making.
Then I ended up in a setting with incurably mentally ill people, but I wasn't incurably mentally ill. Good thing, in a way, because I found how abandoned many were. I was surrounded by paranoid schizophrenics and those with personality disorders and seriously devastating mental illnesses. They didn't put themselves there. They had been abandoned by family, by society. They had nowhere to go.
I found my way back, am less well-off financially than I was but am a much better person than I was. I talk to the street people, and I listen to them. I help when I can. I try to connect them with service agencies. If I see one who's sleeping on the street, I get a warm sweater or blanket for them. I love myself as never before and sleep better at nights knowing that I'm making a difference, even if it is only one person at a time.
We are all here to help each other, and I can state with certainty that any one of us can be there at any time. We don't need to blame those who are homeless, nor do we need to pity them. We don't need to feel guilty when we can't do anything. What we need to do is whatever is necessary to help our fellow man. We were created with love and compassion, and we owe that to all, not just those who are employed and have a big bank account.
I would suggest that you stop and talk to the homeless, it won't hurt and few will bite. Visit a shelter and listen to them. You would be amazed at what you learn, and the biggest thing you would learn is there is no room for judgment. Remember the saying, "You may not always get what you want, but you will always get what you need." We must always remember that we are in this life together. I recently read a great saying that goes, roughly, "It's not the event or circumstance that matters, it's how you respond to it that counts."
If the posters who state that homeless and the poor are looking for handouts, instead spent a little time doing research on poverty statistics, they would find the numbers of those abusing the systems to less than 4%.
I wonder how many judgemental people actually know what the poverty line is, or the minium and\or average wage from state to state, or the cost of living from state to state, even county to county.
Since the beginning of time, when dealing with the poor, it has been embedded into society's collective mind that it is their fault - whether mental illness, physical illness, substance abuse, environmental factors contribute or not - people don't want to care.
Among the homeless people I worked with last year, most were developmentally disabled and from poor families. Classism plays a huge role in who gets what in this nation. Many of these people were addicted to drugs or alcohol by grammar school, two were full-blown alcoholics in kindergarten, and many had fetal alcohol syndrome.
The current relief systems have caps set so low that many do not qualify, and indeed, if they make a dollar over their low monthly income levels, they lose benefits. Even if they wanted to work, and most that are not mentally or physically handicapped do, they cannot afford to when their paychecks are less than their benefits. That is a reality in affluent Bergen County, NJ.
Having been a grassroots homeless advocate, I observed a very uncaring attitude on the part of the social workers and county workers and not only that, watched many times as they helped themselves to perks, donations, services, gift cards, county gas, etc. Talk about being on the dole.