Replies to 'Pornography'

Okay,tis hard for me to speak of this but am tired of being (NOT IN THE MOOD) for my husband when it comes to intimacy,be it affection or in the bedroom,I know I am going thru the change of life which doesn't help matters but back in 2002 our computer had crashed and we got it fixed and so while I was trying to get back some of my e-mail mates to write to and also my buddies on my messenger list I had gone into my husbands archives because we have mutual friends and wot I found left me feeling betrayed and angry,he had a online conversation with a woman,twas verra sexually graphic and she had even sent him live nude shots of herself and in one of the shots my husband told her she look good enough to eat,I was too dam angry to be hurt or to cry,now prior to all this muck happening my husband and I back when this happened were only a live-in couple and we had not gotten intimate until 6 mos after getting together and there was 3 times I made the first move to be intimate,all 3 times he turned me down and since then I have not made the first move,anyway getting back to the topic when I discovered this online conversation he did not one time mention he had a girlfriend living with him so I took it upon myself to inform her,also it did not help knowing she was attainable,she just lived in the next town over,wot I don't understand when this happened my husband knew I had past issues with porn and be cheated on several times by my last husband,I'm on my 3rd marriage......I got friends that ell me they and they'er partners do porn and as long as its done openly between the 2 partners there is nothing wrong with it,hellooooooooooooo,porn is wot got me 2nd divorce, here I go digressing,anyway by nature I am not a trusting person,tis why I waited 6 mos before he and I got intimate,I just needed to make sure this one would work out,now I have no sexual desire at all,he tells me today after one time reminding him of the times he turned me down that he would never turn me down again,too late,we got married 2 yrs ago due to a cancer scare and even tho I love him dearly I want no part of intimacy in any way shape or form,he has a high sex drive and I fear he may stray tho he says he never would,now I know I will sound hypocritical when I say this but I caved in and bought him a porn dvd so he would  not bother me for sex,does it work? (NOT),HE WANTS ME MORE THAN EVER AND THE FEELING IS TOTALLY NOT MUTUAL,I can't stand being touched,I hate kissing and even holding hands,can I ever get my drive back???

Help!!!!!

Okay,tis hard for me to speak of this but am tired of being (NOT IN THE MOOD) for my husband when it comes to intimacy,be it affection or in the bedroom,I know I am going thru the change of life which doesn't help matters but back in 2002 our computer had crashed and we got it fixed and so while I was trying to get back some of my e-mail mates to write to and also my buddies on my messenger list I had gone into my husbands archives because we have mutual friends and wot I found left me feeling betrayed and angry,he had a online conversation with a woman,twas verra sexually graphic and she had even sent him live nude shots of herself and in one of the shots my husband told her she look good enough to eat,I was too dam angry to be hurt or to cry,now prior to all this muck happening my husband and I back when this happened were only a live-in couple and we had not gotten intimate until 6 mos after getting together and there was 3 times I made the first move to be intimate,all 3 times he turned me down and since then I have not made the first move,anyway getting back to the topic when I discovered this online conversation he did not one time mention he had a girlfriend living with him so I took it upon myself to inform her,also it did not help knowing she was attainable,she just lived in the next town over,wot I don't understand when this happened my husband knew I had past issues with porn and be cheated on several times by my last husband,I'm on my 3rd marriage......I got friends that ell me they and they'er partners do porn and as long as its done openly between the 2 partners there is nothing wrong with it,hellooooooooooooo,porn is wot got me 2nd divorce, here I go digressing,anyway by nature I am not a trusting person,tis why I waited 6 mos before he and I got intimate,I just needed to make sure this one would work out,now I have no sexual desire at all,he tells me today after one time reminding him of the times he turned me down that he would never turn me down again,too late,we got married 2 yrs ago due to a cancer scare and even tho I love him dearly I want no part of intimacy in any way shape or form,he has a high sex drive and I fear he may stray tho he says he never would,now I know I will sound hypocritical when I say this but I caved in and bought him a porn dvd so he would  not bother me for sex,does it work? (NOT),HE WANTS ME MORE THAN EVER AND THE FEELING IS TOTALLY NOT MUTUAL,I can't stand being touched,I hate kissing and even holding hands,can I ever get my drive back???

Help!!!!!