Quote From: riperladyHow funny you should say that because that word caught my attention too. Let me see if I can explain how I feel about that word. I feel for others too my friends, co-workers, people on TV but as far as the people really close in my life like my kids and spouse/significant other I don't think I have empathy. I am not sure why but that I have to agree with and I even asked one of my kids if I had empathy and she said no. I can feel for others but I can not feel for myself I hope that makes some sense.
I caught the doc speaking of how CSA victims dont feel empathy. Though it didnt make me angry it did make me raise my eyebrow in confusion. Im very empathetic. Most times too empathetic for my own good! So I was confused by that statement as well.
I do understand about feeling for others and not yourself. After I brought my abuse out I felt a ton of guilt. I had my husband telling me I didnt do anything wrong and have nothing to feel guilty about but it didnt help the guilt go away. Well... not right off, anyways. The one thing that allowed my guilt to turn into anger was finding out about all the other children. I was able to be angry for them, if not myself, at first. Feeling the anger for the other family victims allowed me to feel it for myself. It did take a bit of time, but it did help me.
I often find that surviors are able to feel for others easier then themselves. I think we feel others are more deserving of sympathy kindness compassion, then we are. I used to feel that way. Now I know im just as deserving as anyone else so I gladly accept a kind word when I can get it! ;)
